Hello Trashtalkers! Some of the couples on this show have turned out to be a real snooze fest. I still think they are making a dumb decision, but people make dumb decisions all the time. It’s part of being an adult. Anyway, this episode we meet the last couple on this unique journey during this episode.
Mark and Nikki
Nikki is finally meeting Mark’s daughter Elise now that Nikki is living with Mark. Mark is reminding me of a smaller Henry Winkler / younger Harvey Levin without any of the success. The three sit down and sweat during an awkward dinner. Mark encourages them to find common ground, and Elise points out that like Nikki, Elise is also somewhat Filipino, there you go. Haha burn.
*New Couple Alert! *
Fernando and Carolina
Fernando is 39 years old and we can tell he lives in Florida because of the Latin music soundtrack and girls butts. Look at all those bums! Fernando was married in the past, but he cheated, and he is very surprised that he has done pretty well in the ladies department. I think he is very insecure and fills this void with attention from lonely women. He is not a catch.
Fernando met Carolina in Columbia when they were both on a date with other people. Yuck. There is a 17 year age difference between the two of them. Fernando lives with his parents who seem not so thrilled about Carolina’s impending arrival to the home. His mom already let’s us know that she doesn’t want to cook Carolina rice everyday just because she’s Colombian and won’t like their Mexican food.
Fernando and Carolina talk on Skype about her K-1 visa application, which Fernando keeps on fucking up. He has not been like, the best, or most faithful, or honest with Carolina in the past so she is questioning how bad he wants them to be together.
Fernando packs up to fly to Carolina because the visa is taking longer than expected. Fernando’s mother is less than impressed with this idea! But she is glad that Carolina hasn’t come to the US yet because Fernando’s mother needs time to get ready.
Kyle and Noon
Noon has arrived in New Orleans to live with Kyle and his roommate. Noon lugged her own bag into the boys apartment and you can tell she is already unhappy. Kyle has tried his best to “cover up” his mess there are cockroaches everywhere. And no privacy. Noon says that she doesn’t think that she wants to live in this house, which is a good instinct.
Kyle shows Noon Bourbon Street, where all the dirty stuff goes down. Kyle points out piss on the street and then gets Noon a nice Daiquiri with a lot of alcohol. Noon isn’t a drinker and doesn’t want to ever go back to Bourbon Street. The couple meet with up Kyle’s friends for dinner and reveal that Kyle hasn’t told his divorced parents about Noon or the upcoming nuptials. Red flag.
Alexei and Loren
Loren is at her NYC apartment waiting to hear from Alexei. He is about to find out if his visa application is approved and she is filtering water and lighting candles like a mad woman. Loren stays up until 2 AM to hear from Alexei and good news, he nailed the interview and they can finally be together! She is totally not going to work tomorrow. She has people to call (and wake up) to tell them she is getting married ahhhh!
Loren packs up all her shit to move to Florida with her parents. Her parents are very supportive of this dumb idea because she’s technically an adult and what are ya going to do. It is good they will be around to make sure he doesn’t beat her or something. Loren picks up Alexei at Miami Airport and the two act like they have been reunited after being away from war. But Loren lets Alexia know that he smells so bad. Um yea, he was just on a transatlantic flight from the Middle East to MIAMI. That is a plane full of sweat.
Melanie and Devar
Old fashioned Melanie and Devar have lived together for a few days now. Devar and Hunter wear matching white tanks while working out in the family room. Then Hunter takes Devar outside to the tennis courts to teach him baseball.
After work, Melanie takes her boys to dinner to have mozzarella sticks and hot wings. He doesn’t embrace mozz sticks so I am really starting to dislike Devar. He wins some points back when he asks Hunter to be his Best Man at the wedding.
Melanie meets up with her sister Beverly and her husband for dinner the next night to get to meet Devar. Beverly absolutely does not trust Devar. She immediately asks Devar if he was sleeping around in Jamaica and using her sister for a green card. You go Bev! Someone has to ask these questions! But then Bev brings up her concerns about STDs which is gross. Safe but gross I guess.
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