Welcome back to The Bethenny Show- the show where Andy Cohen asks questions and Bethenny just talks over everyone’s answers, I’m your recapper, MisRed. Okay, I’ve already watched the show once, without taking any notes. Thank God for closed captioning.
Previously, Andy asked Dorinda if she has a drinking problem. And no matter how many times he rephrased it or emphasized different words…
DO you have a problem with alcohol?
Do YOU have a problem with alcohol?
Do you HAVE a problem with alcohol?
Do you have A problem with alcohol?
Do you have a PROBLEM with alcohol?
Do you have a problem WITH alcohol?
Do you have a problem with ALCOHOL?
The answer was always the same: “Who’sAlCohol?Nevermettheguy.”
The show opens with Andrew Cohen Broken Record, “So you do not think you have a problem with alcohol?” Dorinda admits that she was in a bad place last fall….and apparently, winter and spring as well, and it was starting to become a problem. Starting? She checked herself and analyzed why she was using it as an outlet.
Because the cocaine wasn’t cutting it anymore? Just a thought. ALLEDGEDLY.
I talk to my mom, alright? She makes it nice.
Dorinda says she has been seeing some therapist every two weeks. She will not go more frequently than that because she feels she can’t commit to going weekly- and she talks to her Mom. She says this as if it’s unorthodox, which it may be considered so, however depending on one’s relationship, it may not be unusual.
Talking to your mother is such a pussy move.
This elicits a smirk from Bethenny, who, of course, detests her own mother and hasn’t had an actual conversation with her in years. `
Andy asks about Colombia when Lu says “You are turning…” Dorinda maintains she was NOT drunk at that moment.
Well that is even more terrifying.
Dorinda says she is still mad about that situation. Sonja says to Bethenny “She was drunk.”
Bethenny, in her deer stand, says to Ramona “You said that. I know you are on this program right now where you don’t say anything you actually feel, but you said she was drunk.”
Ramonac does not recall.
Bethenny says Ramona said that Dorinda was drunk at the dinner and after. Ramona says she doesn’t remember- not in a fake amnesia way- but more in an offhanded way.
Because you know Ramona only watches her scenes, right? She’s a regular Scheana. But she must have missed this one because the scene was mainly about Dorinda and Luann.
They roll the tape where Ramona says that Dorinda does not need another drink and Dorinda told her to “Shut your mouth.”
Before I stuff it full of anti-skin care
Ramona continued that people do tend to change their personality after three drinks. Dorinda says there is no change.
She’s can be a belligerent asshole after ZERO drinks.
Dorinda says that Lu’s statement was “loaded.” Yeah, well, so was Dorinda.
Ramona thinks that the statement came at an inopportune moment- that’s MisRed’s word, not Ramona’s. Ramona couldn’t come up with “inopportune” on her own, especially not in the correct context. She continues, although Bethenny tries to talk over her, that they were all out, having a good time and she felt that Luann was judging her- which she was- and Dorinda thought it was hypocritical (again, MisRed’s word, not Ramona’s. “Dorinda felt that LuAnn was being hypochondriacal.”) as she had just gotten out of rehab and shouldn’t be judging anyone else for drinking, especially, someone like Dorinda, who had been a really good friend to her.
Dorinda says she even had a special telephone ring for Luann when she was in rehab and would call her at 3am- “Why Don’t We Get Drunk and Screw” by Jimmy Buffet- it really dual purpose- covering both the booze and the “street meat” situations. Just kidding. That wasn’t the ringtone. MisRed just made that up. Really, it’s “Margaritaville.”
Bethenny interrupts that it’s not normal circumstances- “the woman just got out of jail and rehab and so she’s not going to act normally.”
Ugh. MisRed really can’t take all of this Luann pandering, also if Lu wasn’t one of Bethenny’s soldiers, you know she would have been attacking her for getting arrested and blowing a C.O. to get Ramen from commissary, blah blah blah.
A viewer questions if seeing Luann get arrested and “make a new commitment to live a sober life” (sorry, MisRed can’t even say that with a straight face) make Dorinda ever wonder if she should give sobriety a whirl too?
Dorinda is like- Uh no. Because she says SHE didn’t get arrested.
Then she says what we all know to be true “You gotta remember, Luann didn’t go to rehab because she had some huge revelation. She went to rehab because she needed to stay out of jail and was practically court ordered.” JOVANI!!!!
Bethenny says getting arrested isn’t the only reason to go and get help. Dorinda says that she agrees, but if she feels she needs to go to rehab, she will go. Bethenny asks “Some would argue that saying to your friend who just got out of rehab- is an ex-countess felon might be hitting bottom.” Dorinda says no.
Bethenny called Luann “a slut and a liar and a hypocrite and a snake” two years ago in the Beserkshires, but that didn’t prompt Bethenny to go to snake-charming school.
Plus… Dorinda didn’t say anything untrue. She is an ex-Countess, she was charged with a felony, she did have a mug shot, etc. Granted her delivery wasn’t the most graceful but…
Andy says that Dorinda was upset that Lu didn’t apologize (in earnest) for her part in the whole Colombia argument and asks the other women if they thought Dorinda had the right to want an apology? Ramona says that Lu should have apologized for upsetting Dorinda. Sonja waits for Bethenny to tell her how to respond.
It must have been so humiliating to threaten to kill a cop…
Bethenny says “I think that I can’t imagine how degrading it would be to get arrested and have that video out and then go to rehab and have to rehabilitate and walk into the Countess thing, and I think we could have been a little more sensitive in someone who had just gotten out of rehab and give her the benefit of the doubt.”
Dorinda says she was sensitive and I’m so proud of myself. I’ve been so sensitive 24/7 to her- I’ve been a really good friend to her more than anyone else here.
Sonja says “Like, you never turn when you drink, and she was just saying you were turning.”
Dorinda is like- Shut up, Sonja. THANK YOU. And Carole says that Sonja is the LAST person to be talking about being drunk.
Sonja says, “I don’t get drunk and insult my friends’ vaginas.” Dorinda is like, you’re drunk all the time, Sonja- keep your mouth shut.
The EZPass makes the most sense, especially at Sonja’s occupancy rates.
Did Dorinda insult Sonja’s vagina? Oh well, she said that it should have an EZPass. But that’s just good business. To be a successful slut, you need to hit the big numbers and you can’t do that if you have to stop and make change for penises passing through. Dorinda was giving Sonja sound business advice, not insulting her.
And another thing, F*ck you Bethenny, and here’s why. A) You are a hypocrite. You have always hated Luann and now suddenly you are her biggest champion because you know the only other person in your corner is a drunk whore who can’t possibly do anything for you. B) Stop making Luann out to be some kind of SAINT who was in the wrong place and the wrong time and was falsely accused of some crime and was sold down the river. Luann actually DID all of the things for which she was arrested. C) If Ramona was the one who was arrested, how would you be treating HER in this situation? Not well, bitch. D) You will be back to hating Luann next season if we know you.
And Sonja- STFU. You live in a glass house. You are a drunk slut who can’t keep her clothes on or her legs closed. You are the last one who should be judging ANYONE for ANYTHING. Go suck a d*ck.
Andy brings up the moment when Dorinda was in tears in Colombia – telling Bethenny that she felt badly that she was no longer Lu’s safe place. Dorinda says that she realized what she did and said had really hurt Luann. They have had a long, deep friendship and she felt badly- and she feels badly for what Luann is going through now.
Andy asks who thought it was wrong that Luann invited Scott to her Cabaret the day of the show? Ramona says it was. Bethenny jumps on the Lu defense train saying that Luann had learned her lesson from what happened with the Dorinda / John situation. Everyone else is like- no, she was covering up. Lu apparently texted Dorinda that she had planned for it to be a girls’ night and that’s why John wasn’t invited. She texted to Dorinda “It’s just a girls’ night only. I thought you understood that.”
Ok, well if that’s the case that changes a lot of how I feel about the situation. A) When was it planned to be a GNO? B) Were the girls ever informed that it was a GNO or was it just ASSUMED that they knew by Lu? C) If it was stated to be a GNO from the jump, Dorinda shouldn’t have been mad about John not being invited and furthermore Lu should NOT have invited Scott- even at the last minute. She could have texted Tinsley and been like “Hey, just wanted to clarity I didn’t invite Scott because it’s a GNO.” Or something to that.
Who wants street meat????
A simple “Leave the street meat at home girls, Momma is going SOLO tonight!” would have sufficed.
Andy asks Ramona her opinion on the topic? Ramona says that she could understand why Dorinda was hurt, but Dorinda did not intend to address the situation that night because it was Lu’s night. When the hubbub started and Bethenny got involved, Ramona says she TOLD Bethenny not to say anything because Dorinda didn’t want to ruin Lu’s night. But Bethenny insisted she needed to talk to Luann.
Bethenny raises the shield and deflects right onto Carole… that during the show, when Luann was trying to focus on singing off-key, Carle told Tinsley she MUST tell Dorinda about the Scott/ John thing- causing Dorinda to go into a JovaniRage.
They argue about how “Jovani” was said and intended.
Bethenny imitates Dorinda’s Jovani
Andy says it seems like Dorinda was heckling her. I mean, I’m sure there was PLENTY to heckle Luann about during the show, probably the least of which being JOVANI. Ramona says that the Jovani was very mean spirited. Hey, all of these betches have their weapons.
Weapons of choice:
Bethenny: Cutting Insults
Teresa Giudice: Tables and Sprinkle Cookies
LeeAnne Locken: Knives. Or hands. Whatever is available.
Dee Simmons: Stares of Judgement
Brandi Redmond: Sexual Chocolate
Vicki Gunvalson: Fake Cancer
Wendy from Hartford wants to know who is legitimately concerned about Dorinda’s drinking? Carole and Ramona say yes. Andy says that Lu said that Dorinda had a drinking problem and Dorinda was jealous of her- how did Dorinda take that in? She’s like- I didn’t. I don’t care. She says she has really tried with her friendship with Lu and she can’t do it anymore. She hopes that it’s just a blip and they will be friends again one day- but it’s healthy to take a pause sometimes.
For f*cksake we are 9 minutes into the episode.
Let’s dedicate 18 seconds to Tinsley
We get the Tinsley package. Ok we can US Weekly this sh*t. Basically, Tinsley and Scott are on and off.
When they are off, both see other people. When they are off, it’s never for a specific reason, Tinsley thinks that Scott focuses on his work so much that he doesn’t feel he has time for her.
Yet he’s able to have time to date other women when they aren’t together? Okayyyyy. She says she doesn’t like the fact that he dates other women but she doesn’t want to get too upset and risk losing Scott for good.
Andy asks whether Scott and Dale get along. Tinsley says she tries to keep Dale away from Scott because Dale is Satan in a circle pin.
Don’t make me beat you with my Bermuda Bag.
She got all emotional seeing her frozen eggs because it represents hope for her future.
The Tinsley Bunch… plus Alice
Surprisingly, Bethenny doesn’t tear Tinsley down for this. Carole asked for two of the eggs to be poached and one to be hard boiled… but not touching.
Tinsley sees she and Scott being engaged in the next year.
This is the space for the Luann package and how she triumphed over a quickie divorce and an embarrassing arrest to become a CULTURAL PHENOMENON…
Round of applause for Lu and all of her screw-ups!!
but Lu is back in rehab to avoid addressing her relapse and her children’s lawsuit against her. They review the highlights or the Lulights as the case may be:
Of course. Bethenny is always right.
Lu telling Bethenny she was right about Tom. They review her arrest- and her threatening to kill everyone and review her charges and that embarrassing dress she wore.
Ramona’s face though…
Oddly, they don’t review Lu choking on the mustard packet, which is a shame because I was really looking forward to seeing that.
Lu doesn’t feel she needs to label herself as an alcoholic… we review rehearsal and the cabaret performance… the subsequent swelling of Lu’s head to epic proportions… her self-pride in pulling herself together…. Then… womp womp womp… RELAPSE.
Andy asks Bethenny what is going on with Luann? She says she spent time with Lu over the weekend and had hooked her up with Dennis because her legal situation became more complicated.
I’m so confused about Dennis’s career… I’ve seen banker, I’ve seen financier, I’ve seen entrepreneur, I’ve seen producer, I’ve seen mogul…
Bethenny says that Lu had to face reality over the weekend and realized that with her kids’ lawsuit against her that she was off-track.
Andy says that Lu was very dismissive of all of the women last season- calling them all “jealous bitches,” do they think Lu came into the season with her tail between her legs because of what happened with Tom?
The ladies think she came into the season pretending to have already moved on and that she just wanted to sweep it under the rug. Andy thinks it was a big moment when she admitted that Bethenny was right about Tom. Bethenny thinks it was a turning point for their relationship and at that point Lu knew she should trust that Bethenny had some level of good judgment.
I told her Tom likes to go South of the Highway.
Ramona says she told Lu all of the poop on Tom the previous year in Mexico. She told it to her off camera and Ramona surmises that is why Lu fell in the bushes.
Andy asks if it could have been because of the 18 tequila shots she had- and Dorinda says this is WHY Lu had 18 tequila shots.
Andy asks if the girls suspected Lu was drinking again? Ramona says she knew Luann was drinking again- she was drunk at The Beacon and was pulling a Sonja- her head in someone’s lap and laying down with her vag out. Luann was escorted out. Ramona is surprised it wasn’t on Page Six. Yeah, well Sonja wasn’t there to call it in. Ramona also says Lu was drunk at another party and was asked to leave.
Bethenny said she knew Lu was drinking again too and that she didn’t come to the decision to go back to rehab entirely on her own.
Well when was her plea deal reached? It calls for no possession or consumption of alcohol and a year probation among other things. She probably went to rehab to reset the dials, so she wasn’t ALREADY in violation of her probation.
Bethenny said the weekend was very emotional. Andy asks what do they think made Lu reintroduce alcohol back into the mix? Sonja pipes in that when she was stripping Lu’s cabaret show, Lu wasn’t drinking. Andy says that when he saw Lu’s act she seems “off.”
Andy says that all of the ladies have talked about how much more genuine they think Lu has been post-rehab- what did they see that was different? Bethenny says that Lu just wants to be loved and she is “kind of like a big baby.”
She is like a baby. But a dude. Like a Man Baby.
The women agree that Lu is happiest when she’s in a relationship and has her family around, and she can make sure Ictoria is bathing regularly and things really started unraveling years ago when the Count was having an affair and they got divorced.
A viewer asks Ramona why- after saying how inappropriate it was for Tom to have his New Year’s Eve party on the boat where he and Lu had their engagement party- why did she then try to go to the New Year’s Eve party? It’s not that big of a mystery, Ramona is a leech.
Ramona says, again, it was her friend that wanted to go, so that’s why she reached out to him. She says it probably wasn’t the smartest thing to do- and in retrospect she should have just told her friend that she didn’t feel comfortable reaching out and asking. Bethenny relishes pointing out that Tom declined to let Ramona come to the party. So Ramona went to Pamona’s party instead.
Every party needs a trampoline.
Sonja pipes up that SHE was invited to Tom’s party. Of course you were, Sonja. Tom is always looking for somewhere to holster his pecker for the night. She says she KNEW not to even respond to the invitation.
Oh, okay so Sonja is a non-RSVPing asshole too.
Andy asks if the ladies think the success of Lu’s Cabaret changed her. They say yes. Dorinda says that she has lost some people in her life because they can’t handle her ego. Bethenny says that the arrest and the show made her more famous than she has ever been. Dorinda says Lu got confused between fame and infamy. Bethenny says that it’s just part of it and Lu is “on a journey.”
My god, I hate that phrase.
Oh god, coming up The Bethenny / Carole feud.
We come back from commercial with a clip montage of bickering between the two women. Bethenny says that Carole doesn’t return messages, Carole always defends the person sitting next to her, Carole isn’t interested in the work Bethenny is doing and they don’t have that much in common, Carole doesn’t have kids or a career, clips of them arguing over Adam, their text messages, Carole being into her hair and clothes and Tinsley and selfies, the Red Scarf Rivalry- Bethenny’s subsequent bashing of Red Scarf, etc.
And to continue to throw gasoline onto this bonfire.
It’s pointless to recap this word for word.
Andy asks… What happened? Apparently, the entire thing started when Carole spent the summer in California – she was supporting a friend who had lost her husband. She and Bethenny just didn’t spend a lot of time together as they had the previous year. Bethenny felt slighted not to be included in certain events in Carole’s life.
Carole says that she always defends Bethenny to people – when she hears people say nasty things about Bethenny she always shuts down the convo saying that perhaps Bethenny was having a bad day and that Carole thinks Bethenny is a great girl. Yada yada yada. But when the topic came to Adam, Bethenny didn’t reciprocate the tactic that Carole used, she just piled on instead of shutting down the conversation. Bethenny argues that she thought Carole and Adam had broken up.
Ok, but still, you don’t necessarily bash someone just because they are no longer with your friend. Especially when the break-up was amicable.
Andy thinks there was a lot of miscommunication and they could never get things back on track. Thanks Captain Obvious. Carole says that Bethenny didn’t want to get things back on track and Bethenny wanted it to be over.
Carole kept asking Bethenny to talk and Bethenny wouldn’t talk to her- it was all just texting. Carole says they had a good talk after the holidays, but Carole was going to proceed with caution. Carole says she just wanted to move on and remember why they were friends.
Then we get into the text war. Bethenny claims that Carole told Bethenny not to talk about her to the other women on camera. Carole denies this and then Bethenny reaches behind her and WHIPS out a pink plastic folder with all of the text messages printed out.
You better believe I’ve been keeping score…
Meanwhile, Carole puts on her readers and gets on her phone, scrolling through texts.
They will never agree about the content, tone, context of the texts so it’s pointless to rehash. Net/Net Bethenny accuses Carole of being sad. Bethenny calls Ramona evil. Bethenny continually calls Carole cold. Carole tells Bethenny that this isn’t a conversation for text. Bethenny continued to text and text and text.
Bethenny says that on the show Carole talked badly about Bethenny the whole season and that Bethenny only said one bad thing “Carole doesn’t have a career.” Carole is like… I didn’t say anything bad about you- I couldn’t have been nicer. Bethenny disputes it.
Andy says they both said negative things about each other.
No, YOU suck!
Bethenny says that Carole’s life is an empty shell, no husband, no children and no career. Carole says that if Bethenny ain’t happy, she will make everyone else miserable. Bethenny recounting all of the trips she took Carole on and that Carole is America’s Houseguest. Carole saying that Bethenny always plays the victim. Bethenny calls Carole a moron for not fixing Dorinda’s lipstick. Carole says Bethenny crashes and burns relationship.
Carole says that up until The Mayflower and Colombia, Carole really hadn’t said anything bad. Bethenny disputes this saying that Carole called her a liar. Carole says that Bethenny is a liar. Bethenny denies being a liar. Carole says all Bethenny did all season was bully, brag and bitch.
Bethenny wants examples. Carole tries to give an example but Bethenny keeps talking over her. Because Bethenny always has to have the last word. After several false starts, Carole says that Bethenny got upset because she and Tinsley were friends- and then Carole says she really can’t even remember all of the insults and reaches for her phone.
You act like you are a journalist or something!
Bethenny then mocks Carole saying, “Go to your notes… your COPIOUS research…”. Honey, you are the one with the pink folder stashed behind the couch cushions.
Carole goes to her notes of what Bethenny has called her:
Clingy girlfriend, thick as thieves (with Tinsley), unavailable…
Bethenny interrupts snarkily saying “Ooooooh, that’s bullying….are you going to be okay?”
Poor Cawole got her feewings huwt
Well not sure if it’s bullying, but it certainly is being an interrupting bitch. Carole is like- can I speak? Bethenny continues to talk over her.
This is so painful.
Carole says that Bethenny created a false narrative about her.
Carole continues: I was not wanted in Puerto Rico because I care more about clothes than causes, all I care about is hair, and selfies, I’m sad, I’m lonely, I’m in pain over a break-up, I’m a know-it-all politician with a dead husband, I’m a puppet, I’m un-self-aware.
Bethenny says “I didn’t say puppet. Ramona did.” LOL.
She’s not the only one.
Carole keeps going “I’m self-involved, I’m superficial, I’m high maintenance, childless, jobless…
Ramona says she thinks Bethenny was talking about herself.
Ramona loves that Bethenny is fighting with someone other than her
Carole says as far as she can tell, Carole and Bethenny have the same careers. Bethenny says they don’t. That’s right, Carole has 3 Emmys and a Peabody. Bethenny has shitty tasting booze and bologna, which don’t look quite as impressive on the fireplace mantle.
Carole says that Bethenny also age-shamed her. Bethenny denies this. That what she did wasn’t age shaming. Bethenny says that she wishes Carole would embrace the age she actually is.
What does Bethenny think a 54-year-old should do… ride around on a Jazzy? As opposed to Bethenny who wears her kids pajamas and posts it on Instagram.
Speaking of acting like a 7 year old
Andy wants to know Bethenny’s reaction to Carole’s accusations? Bethenny says that none of Carole’s list- which is very weak- is bullying. Bethenny says that Carole has said 50 times worse things about Bethenny. Carole says that she said she was proud of Bethenny. Bethenny says Carole called her a narcissist twice and that Bethenny put on a performance when the Nutcracker arrived.
Well, I mean, she did. She knew the Nutcracker had been found. She knew it was coming to her apartment. What else would you call her reaction?
Bethenny wants to know why nobody else feels this way about her? Um, they do. And so does, at least, half the audience.
Carole says that by the time they got to Colombia she couldn’t take it anymore. Bethenny asks why she wasn’t a narcissist last year? Carole says she was. Bethenny says that Carole says that she has mental disorders. Carole denies it. Bethenny counts being a narcissist is a mental disorder.
Well…you are a narcissist.
Yes. Technically. It falls under the subset of personality disorders under the umbrella of mental disorders.
Andy says that at the finale, Carole said that she and Bethenny could find their way back. But in one of Carole’s blogs, she said “In Bethenny’s myopic world, she’s the judge, jury and executioner. Her narcissistic personality doesn’t permit any dissenters. She is incapable of having a conversation where she isn’t in control of the entire narrative, her and everyone else’s, regardless of the truth.” Carole is like- yeah, pretty much. “She lies about us over and over and over until even we sometimes believe it. Bethenny should give a master class in gas lighting.”
Bethenny asks Carole when she got her medical degree? Shut up, Bethenny, you judge people CONSTANTLY. Dorinda says that Bethenny passes judgement on people.
Carole says that you don’t need a medical degree to see Bethenny’s issues, just two eyes. And one eye would probably be sufficient- just sayin’.
Bethenny admits she said that Carole doesn’t have a career.
Bethenny is like, you don’t. Carole wants to know if this is what Bethenny calls “female empowerment.” Carole says her blogs were holding Bethenny accountable for what she said on television about Carole not having a career.
Bethenny says that Carole said that her career was what she was doing while Bethenny was doing B movies. Bethenny wants to know if Carole was shaming her. Carole says that it’s the truth. Bethenny was working as an actress… Bethenny interrupts that all she has done is “B movies to this show.”
That’s not even what Carole is saying. She’s saying that Carole’s career heyday was at a time BEFORE Bethenny became successful.
Bethenny says that Carole called Bethenny “a caterer” when in actuality, Bethenny was a chef- a natural food chef even before there was such a category for someone like Adam to follow in her footsteps. Well, that’s debatable.
Remember she used to go around to delis and pick up all of her sh*tty dry cookies that didn’t sell?
And also, Bethenny wasn’t making an actual living as a natural food chef, she was highly in debt and not exactly successful.
Carole says she will match her resume up with Bethenny’s any day.
Bethenny says “Let’s get yours into the current era, the current decade and then we can talk about it.”
Oh f*ck off Bethenny. Yes, you are successful. But you could have just as easily been unsuccessful (or not AS successful) had it not been for this show. And yes, your original SkinnyGirl idea was somewhat novel, but had you not been on this show- in all likelihood it would not have been the success that it is. And you are certainly NOT the first to release your other products. Snacks, Drink Drops, Chocolate, Face Goop, Spanx, Slimming Jeans, Cold Cuts… all of these things have been done before- and you aren’t even the first person on this show to do Spanx-like garments- you are the THIRD. And certainly not all of them have been successful.
In fairness, Bethenny is 7 years younger than Carole. The main part of Carole’s career was earlier- when she was younger than Bethenny is now and she downshifted after her husband’s death. We don’t completely know why, but if I had gone through supporting a husband with a prolonged cancer battle and seeing your two best friends die in a plane crash, and I had the financial stability to take a break and follow my passion or just chill for a while- I totally would. Carole’s book deal came without the help of Andy Cohen or The Real Housewives.
Carole says that a career spans your whole life and people pivot and go into other career phases. Bethenny says that Carole is the one who brought it up and shamed her. Andy actually corrects her saying that Bethenny is the one who brought it up on the show saying that Carole has no career- and Bethenny is like “And she doesn’t.”
Oh Sonja… what do you have besides this show and probably the clap?
And if Bethenny is really going to career bash- why doesn’t she go after her BFF Sonja or Dorinda or Tinsley? Luann was a nurse at one point and now she’s a “cultural phenomenon” so she can’t really bash her. LOL, who am I kidding… yes, we can. She bashes Ramona ad nauseum despite the fact that Ramona has had a legit career. Sure, her side ventures haven’t been successful, but that’s not really her main money-making sitch.
It’s interesting that Bethenny wants to hold Carole responsible and gets upset and cries at every little action or non-action on Carole’s part, but mocks Carole when the she lists the things Bethenny has said that have hurt her.
They get into a screaming match about who bashed who on the show… please, when can this be over? Andy chimes in “You bashed each other on the show. You bashed each other.”
And then the shot heard round the world….
Straw. Camel. Broken. Back.
Carole says, “You’re so full of shit, Andy.”
You know I’m your boss, right?
Andy plunges a knife in Carole’s heart, Bethenny laughs and then it’s curtains for Carole.
<Insert Maniacal Laugh Here>
Carole asks Andy “Are you afraid of her too?”
Andy sarcastically says “Yeah, I’m afraid of her.” Andy has Stockholm Syndrome.
Next week, more Bethenny and Carole fighting and the review of pooping and near death in Colombia. Carole reveals she has a huge hippocampus and Sonja says she has a very small “concanitis” but she has a huge vagina…
and in other news water is wet, and Sonja has no clue what a hippocampus is and there’s no such thing as a “concantis.”
I’m dehydrated… so, so thirsty.
And Ramona gets a cramp.
Who is hanging in with MisRed? Seriously, I need painkillers from this reunion. Do you think Carole had more valid points or Bethenny? Do you think Carole is gone as a direct result of her calling Andy a piece of sh*t? Let me know your thoughts. As always, I thank you for your support. xoxox
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