Greetings, Trashies! So apparently there’s a debate raging, right here at TTTV, as to whether Josh is gay or straight. It’s a real poser, I tell you, a real Escher print of the psyche, if you will. At first glance, as we watch his HoH play out, he appears to be a straight guy scorned by a rejecting Elena, but if you squint, a gay man appears, trying to eliminate the competition for hot-ticket Donkey Kong lookalike, Mark. Either way, Josh announced off-episode — right after the demise of Shriona — that he was hoping to get lucky, and now all of a sudden, he’s hell-bent on evicting Elena.
Let’s back up a bit, shall we?
As we open, Josh has won HoH, and is bawling his eyes out.
Cody has nothing to say. Either that, or he lost his SIM card. Paul loudly proclaims his HoH was NOT a waste, cuz guess who doesn’t have safety anymore. Yeah, yeah, you lucked out on the Hoh comp, Dickwad, that’s all.
Elena goes up to Josh and asks, “Do I have to worry about you putting me up?” Josh says he would like to talk with Elena alone (*wink, wink*), and they’ll see. Mark is only a leetle concerned, because he and Josh “cleared the air” (if you know what I mean) a few days ago.
Could be a porno, with the right music
Now Josh corners Elena in the pantry, and says if he does her a “solid” (*nudge, nudge*), he’ll expect something in return. Elena is totes skeeved out, and handles the situation badly. That is, if Josh means what we think he means.
Presently, Josh confers with Paul & Co. in the Have Not Room. Paul whispers, “Notice, Mark and Elena are not happy.” Just then, Mark enters, and Josh quickly covers by chortling, “Julie said ‘meatball’!” Then Alex charges in, and with Mark literally five feet away, says, “Listen, Elena and Mark are mad…”
“Excuse me Mark, I’m talking to Chucklenuts right now”
Fortunately for Alex, stealth chess player Mark is even more “out to lunch” than she is, so she quickly talks her way out of it. She gets all up in his face about how he’s playing both sides, and how dare he not meld his soul with Paul in eternal servitude? Mark quickly caves, admitting she’s absolutely right.
Now National Hot Dog Day tries to convince Josh to own his HoH, and lock Paul out of the room. “He already thinks it’s his room,” she says.
Time for the Den of Temptation! It’s time for the gang to lock in their choices to play or not to play in this week’s temptation challenge. Cody and Jessi-ho come up with a plan for one of them to win safety, and the other to lose and become the third nominee, so they’re guaranteed a chance to play veto.
”I’ve HAD it with these extensions tearing at my scalp! I mean, I’ve HAD it with these @#$%-ers in the house!”
On the other side of the house, Paul instructs everybody to play in the comp, to keep the safety from J + C. They all say, “Okey doke, sign me up!”
This week, the potion tastes like mayonnaise, much to Jason’s relief.
“Hoo-ee, I hope that’s not what it looks like!”
Aaaaaand… the players are — everybody, yay!
Time for the temptation challenge. The BB house is haunted, and the players must gather clues from three message boards while being accosted by ghouls and zombies in the dark. Once they unscramble the clue, they must take the right object back to the box that closes the portal of hell, or whatever.
The three messages read:
WATCH YOUR BACK
CLOSE THE PORTAL
Chucklenuts thinks the puzzle spells “WRATH”, so he quickly grabs the crow and pops it in the box.
The Crow of Wrath
Elena barges around squeaking, “Eww, get OFF me!” causing us to google “Josh sexually assaulted Elena BB19 spoilers”, unfortunately, to no avail.
Kevin tells us this is nothing compared to the neighborhood he grew up in with his cocaine-dealer dad. Like the badass gangster that he isn’t (so don’t even think it), he’s the only HG who takes the heart out of the jar and carries it casually to the box.
“The ol’ ‘heart in the cookie jar’ trick, just like back home”
Hobagicka is skeered, and wants her mommy.
Cody has seen things in his “active tours of duty”, so he’s not afraid of the dark, or unattractive human corpses, or anything like that.
“I’ve run my hands through Jess’s scalp, dude, this is nothing”
Now the gang gathers in the living room, and the scores are revealed. Huh, funny — three in a row are exactly on the minute mark. How did that happen? They’re also each consecutive odd multiples of three: 5 x 3, 3 x 3, and 1 x 3, equally spaced apart by 6 minutes. But what does it mean? Could it be some kind of Illuminati code brought forth from the bowels of the netherworld?
Mark – 7:06
Kevin – 3:11
Elena – 12:31
Jason – 12:07
Jessica – 15:00
Raven – 9:00
Cody – 3:00
Matt – 3:42
Alex – 3:06
Paul – 3:34
Strange juju in the BB house
I guess it can only mean that Cody won safety and Jess is on the block as the third nominee, in the most excellent of plot twists that was totally not producer-manipulated. The gang quickly figures out that Jess threw the comp on purpose so she could play veto, though none of them notice the coded Illuminati message.
Time for the nomination ceremony! Josh picks Elena and Mark, and claims they’re “pawns”. Then he turns to Jess and lies his ass off that she’s his target, when he’s really after Elena. Or maybe he’s “after” Mark, if you get my drift — or perhaps both, who knows?
“That’s the way to play BB, Boo Boo”
Want more TrashTalk? Follow us on Twitter for updates of recaps as they publish, like us on Facebook for a daily update, watch our TV parody vids on YouTube, or for funny TV pics, heart us on Instagram, and get the occasional gif on Tumblr!