What’s up, victim noise makers? Will Paul’s “backdoor” plan (imagine like 20 more sets of quotation marks there) come to fruition? Who will win the power of veto?
Will Jessica’s tension alopecia continue to induce schadenfreude?
Let’s find out!
In case you forgot what a backdoor is, Paul explains that it’s when you don’t nominate who you actually want to evict right away, but instead pull the ol’ switcheroo using the power of veto.
“It’s a pretty cool tactic your boy invented just now.”
Except the backdoor is usually at least a tiny bit of a surprise, but where’s the fun in that? I mean, the tagline is “Expect the Expected”, after all.
Cody’s programming picks up on the probability that the backdoor is coming his way, so he and Jessica make out until he feels better.
If you enjoy the sound of amplified slurp kisses, definitely spring for CBS All Access; it’s like 80% of the feeds.
In order for Paul’s flawless plan to work, he needs sweet baby Ramses to agree to throw the veto comp. Ramses’ words say sure, but his eyes (and Diary Room interview) tell another story.
Suddenly – er, ssssssssuddenly – it’s Den of Temptation time!
Ugh, now Raven’s got those ears too; they’re multiplying
It’s time to see what curse will befall Cody, Jessica, and Whistlenut. BUT FIRST Jessica (in a shocking turn of events) deduces that Christmas was the temptee since she hates Jessica and Cody, and Whistlenut broke Christmas’ foot. Good job!
The doomed trio enters the Den of Temptation, where the curse is revealed – they are transformed into VETOADS
Not only do they have to wear toad costumes, but they must hop everywhere they go and can only sit on lily pads. Also the sound effects department is in overdrive with sproing sounds and ribbits, so everyone is having a great time.
Later, Paul and Co. start to become ever more suspicious of Ramses since he pops in and out of rooms and conversations – and well, it does seem a little shady.
Not as shady as Kevin’s indoor glasses, but close.
Hoppica and Toady share a tray of dog food and lament his imminent backdooring. She asks if he’d do anything differently so they could have spent more time together in the house, but being a robot, Cody is incapable of regret and says as much around a mouthful of food.
UGH, CHEW FIRST
Veto competition time! Paul hammers on Ramses again that he has to throw the comp, and Ramses is like “yeah sure I guess, but I promised my family I’d never throw a comp”.
I must not bring shame upon the House of Urkel!
The players are the three eviction nominees plus Elena, Matt, and Paul.
Oooh, that squirrel doesn’t look so good.
It’s an airport themed competition, where a series of questions must be answered – correct answers go to the next terminal while wrong answers get delayed and face challenges. Paul goes first and there’s waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too much time spent on him. He has “hilarious” quips for each challenge, and he’s shaking his head so hard with every word I’m expecting it to fly off at any moment.
Come on, that’s not even trying to be a joke.
Anyway, this is a pretty great competition; the clothes are cute, and the challenges faced for wrong answers range from swimming in ice water to eating escargot next to randos.
As the times are revealed, it turns out that Ramses didn’t exactly throw the comp.
Aw dang – THROW it? I thought you said to own it. Guys?
So now Paul is HOH and has the power of veto and, I’m maybe channeling Paul because I’m PISSED.
Cody has already given up on the hopping part of his curse (boooooo), and he’s kind of half heartedly galloping around and making some victim noises of his own.
I mean, he does have a point though – everybody needs to crawl on out of Paul’s ass.
Ramses tries to clear things up with HOH/POV/Your Boy Paul, but it’s too late because production has already started put a ssssssneaky sssssnake sound in every time Ramses turns up.
Sssssso long, Ramssssessss
At the veto ceremony, Paul stands like this forever:
The nominees get a chance to defend themselves, and it’s all pretty run of the mill until Josh exhibits a death wish. He doesn’t plead his case at all, but just goes off on Cody for lying and looking mean and leaking oil all over the place.
Ramses’ face is us all.
Some intense horror movie music gets going as Cody and Josh trade insults, and Ramses continues being delightful.
Since Josh made such a compelling argument, Paul uses the Power of Veto on him and nominates Cody in his place – he actually says “Cody, hop on over”, which makes me unreasonably happy.
Jessica keeps modifying her frog outfit, and I don’t like it.
Sexy frog is going to be a hot Halloween costume this year.
Cody spews some bullshit about alphas and betas, and I’m so done with him – although the house will be boring without him. Also, Josh has taken to calling Cody “meatball, and I don’t get it.
Yeah, you damn pastrami!
Well, if Cody doesn’t get evicted I’ll be as shocked as Raven discovering the slop was made of goldfish this whole time.
“Not my finned friends!”
See you for the live eviction – and as Samuel L. Jackson’s character in Jurassic Park would say, “Hold on to your butts”.