Whiteboards and flip charts! Welcome to the 1970s!
Howdy, Trashmii! Welcome to an extremely educational episode of Sister Wives. We learned so much in this ep:
1. The Browns cemented their reputation as Most Delusional Family in America, with their pitch for millions in VC for the little side business Robyn’s got going;
2. Apart from Janelle, not one Brown adult knows anything about business;
3. Speaking of Janelle, she’s chopped liver to the rest of them;
4. The Queen Mother is a class A bitch. That’s not news, but it bears repeating.
We open with Kody recapping the disastrous visit to Stan and Amy’s venture capital company a few weeks earlier. Christine tells us they now have 20 days to get a business plan together and make a pitch. That would, of course, be enough time for anyone else to come up with a polished, professional presentation. The Browns? Well, if flip charts and binders are your idea of a slick, high-tech presentation, prepare to be delighted!
In a meeting, Kody tells the adults they have to decide what their goal is. I thought it was to make money while working as little as possible, and milk the TLC gravy train for all it’s worth, right? Janelle stresses they have to make a coherent presentation. HAHAHAHAH There’s some talk about it being important that they still like each other once they’ve “agreed on a direction” for the company, given their divergent views. QM interjects “Why do we have to like each other?” Cause you’re supposed to be some kind of freaking quasi-Christian? Cause they’re your sister wives? Cause they manage not to throttle you on a daily basis?
On the couch, Robyn talks about how living and working together means they sometimes bring their personal lives into the business (pointing at QM). QM protests, “Why are you pointing at me?” Robyn “innocently” says it’s because she’s sitting next to QM. Sure. . .
They end the meeting with Kody telling them to take 24-48 hours and think about a “grand vision”. Why didn’t they do this before they launched their website, not 2 years later?
Next, QM tells us she’s taking Robyn to lunch to “have a chat”. At lunch, where QM has a salad that literally is as big as her
head ego(I know! huge!), she says she felt Robyn was angry at her the day QM announced her plans for school escape. Robyn says she’s worried QM will move further away from MSWC and the family.
This? it’s just a little salad topped with all the souls I’ve crushed.
In interview, Robyn compares the talk to guys she used to date. Ah yes, “it’s not you, it’s me”. Classic. Back at the table, Robyn tries to get QM to make a commitment to stay with MSWC, while QM fake-cries. In interview, Robyn says QM’s going to college may make her “disengage from us”, since non-polygamous relationships are much easier (but “not as rewarding”, she hastens to add). Ya know, if polygamy were the wonderland these gals always tell us it is, why are they so afraid when anyone has contact with the non-plyg world? Hmmm?
For her part, QM makes a vague statement about not going anywhere. Oh right, just like all those guys I used to date in my 20s. Sidenote: at one time, I simultaneously dated 3 guys named Steve. 2 of them knew each other. None knew I was dating the others. It all went well — until one day I slipped up and talked to one Steve about something another Steve was doing, and he realized something was up. Shortly after that, my whole house of Steves came crumbling down. Sad Steve horns.
The adults traipse over to Nancy Hunterton, their therapist, to talk about the presentation. I know, that makes no sense to me, either. Kody tells us that none of the wives want to be subordinate to each other, so he has to be the boss (CEO). QM shares with us that in polygamy, wives should not be “ruling over” any other wives. Of course, what she really means is that no one except the QM should be ruling over any other wives. Let’s face it, it’s been a reign of terror on her part since the day Kody married Janelle.
I am the all-powerful First Wife! Bow before me!
Nancy asks who the CFO is, and Kody says Robyn. Robyn? Robyn? Janelle is visibly upset, and asks why she’s been up till midnight running financials. She asks is she just a floater who bails out others? Idiot Kody says the CFO makes financial decisions (god forbid the only sensible wife would do that!), and Janelle has to tell him no, they just work with numbers. After that, he deigns to make Janelle CFO. D-ckwad.