Hello my loves, my loves, my many, many Gigis!!! You will never be Udder Ones to MisRed.
Wow! What an episode last week!! Have you ever snooped and found a Birthday gift – like one that you didn’t ask for- but when you found it, you were like- THAT’S AWESOME…and then you couldn’t wait for your birthday, so you could open that gift?? That’s what Luann’s arrest was like for MisRed. Didn’t know I even wanted it… but yet, so amazing. Of course, the above scenario never happened to me… well it did, except it was probably a gift for my sister.
Was so hoping for a hog tie…
Last week, the Bethenny / Carole feud came to a simmer, but there is definitely more to come before this pot boils over. Ramona let Bethenny have it while almost letting her dog get killed in the street. Dorinda saved Christmas. Sonja, the Legacy, told her contractor that she had sex on a sink- and then he hanged himself. The Red Cross didn’t want any of the Housewives blood, rightfully so. And Lu. Oh Lu. Cool, so not uncool, Lu- was arrested and thrown in the hoosegow! I’m sure MissAndy was creaming his jeans when this went down. Foaming at the mouth, like the rabid dog that he is.
The episode opens on an upbeat note, Bethenny is heading to Chicago to speak.
She just needs a top hat and she’ll be ready for Lu’s Cabaret
Ramona picks up Dorinda- who is walking with a cane- to take her to the doctor. It seems a Christofle Salt Shaker- say that 5 times fast- fell on Dorinda’s foot. Dorinda tells us that she hasn’t even looked at that salt shaker since Richard died.
Richard? It that you?
Maybe Rich is upgrading from balloons? He’s probably like- Bitch! Stop messing with that sweaty dry cleaner. Lol. Somehow, I don’t think Richard would say “Bitch.” Yes, Yes, Richard and MisRed were very close…
Oh wait, no. Dorinda when to use it and she dropped it. Personally, MisRed’s story makes a better story- so let’s go with that.
Hand MisRed that sweater immediately.
Tinsley and Carole chat on the phone. Tins is in NYC, Carole is in LA… and MisRed loves Tinsley’s sweater… they discuss the Luann arrest. In Carole’s talking head she said that she heard of the arrest and just assumed that Lu got a DUI, but then found out it was a hair more complicated than that.
Celebrities, they are just like us! – Us Magazine
Yeah, threatening to “Kill you all” does tend to ratchet things up a notch. Carole says she’s scared for Lu because “that’s not a good place to be.”
Carole emailed Lu afterwards. WE don’t know if she got a response or not, but MisRed is sure that contest will be coming up. Who reached out first, who talked to the press, who texted, who emailed, who sent a cake with a file in it.
But did anyone send a casserole?
Apparently, Tins was just a few blocks away from the Lu-Mageddon. Tinsley feels badly and also emailed Lu and told her to come to her Mom’s and have a drink. Bahahahahahah. Tinsley is happy to be off the “latest felons” list, I’m sure. Florida and these Housewives do not mix.
Luannnnnn is facing hard time. I was just facing Turtle Time.
In the car, Dorinda and Ramones discuss the Lu sitch. Ramones goes “How’s her spirits?” LOL, spirits… alcohol… eeesh. Dorinda said she has talked to her and Lu is in rehab and is trying to tune out the noise. Dorinda says, “I don’t think she is ready to be back in any kind of polite society.” Well, who wants that? This is the Housewives- who is polite?
Dorinda, ever the fountain of wisdom, says “Sometimes God stops what we can’t stop.” Ramona says that Lu has been in a bad place and has been self-medicating and that she did the same thing when Meeeeeearaaarrrrrrrio was found with that slut in the Haaaaaaaammptons, south of the Highway, of course, okaaaaaay???
Listen, it’s one thing to tie one on and everyone makes bad choices at some point. It’s a shame- for Luann- GOLD for us- that her bad choice was public and, yeah, well, a felony.
MisRed isn’t convinced that Lu is an alcoholic- but who knows. Rehab was probably as much for her court case as anything else. Plus, you know, it’s a nice place to relax from what MisRed hears.
Ramones says that it was a bad idea for Lu to even go to Florida. Tom was having a party at the same place as their engagement party and that was cruel, and Lu shouldn’t have even put herself in that place. MisRed finds it amuzing that people think that Tom a) even remembers Luann b) would ever consider her feelings c) would know proper etiquette if it punched him in the shriveled-apple bag.
Ramones, apparently, kept running into Tom at different parties. Dorinda says that’s her point- Palm Beach- and of course, West Palm, is such a small place, they were bound to cross paths. We don’t really know if Lu even saw Tom.
Back when Lu was assaulting people, merely, with poor taste.
Bethenny proclaims to Kevin that she is proud to say that she had one of Luann’s LAST Big Nights Out. Remember, when she was only being racially insensitive to the masses when she was dressed as Diana Ross and she and Bethenny partied and got “street meat.” Bethenny says she doesn’t really know where Lu’s head is at- there could be a myriad of emotions- she could “Deny and blame, accept and evolve, cry and be vulnerable.” Bethenny thinks that the pressure cooker just exploded. Valid.
Back with Tinsley and Carole, they are straight-up gossiping about the sitch, which surely Lu will call them out at the reunion, especially Radziwill.
Tinsley is unsure how Lu could have escaped Palm Beach handcuffs- Luann is the size of a linebacker- she probably bent the steel. She is sure Lu felt horrible the next day. Tinsley, says, Yes, they both have Palm Beach mug shots, but their cases are very different- Tinsley’s was a misdemeanor and, well, Lu threatened to kill everyone.
Who wore it better?
It comes out that Bethenny is having a party to celebrate “Skinny Girl Jeans.” Carole won’t be back in time and Ramona wasn’t invited.
Ramona tells Dorinda about the whole phone call with Bethenny- the one where her dog almost got killed in the street.
Run away, Cocoa, Run away!
Dorinda says she and Bethenny were in a really good place before “The Nutcracker.”
There was a small debate, in the comments, last week as to whether or not Bethenny actually thanked Dorinda sufficiently for “The Nutcracker.” Should Dorinda even EXPECT a thank you? Did she do the good deed to do the good deed or did she do it to get a “Thank you.” The fact is- the words “Thank you” were never spoken. Yes, Bethenny was super excited and seemed grateful – MisRed doesn’t dispute, however, in MisRed’s opinion, if Bethenny wasn’t going to write a thank you note- which in MisRed’s opinion, she SHOULD HAVE DONE- Bethenny is old enough to remember the concept of thank you notes and the concept of being grateful for something and telling the giver that you appreciate their thoughtfulness, yada yada yada, Bethenny should have, AT MINIMUM, taken Dorinda aside, given her a hug and said “Thank you for doing this for my daughter.”
I’m sorrrrry, I’m sorrrrry, anything less is déclassé!
MisRed needs to vomit, so let’s check in at Sonja’s. All of her old, crappy furniture is covered in plastic sheeting.
As if this crap isn’t already coated in dust.
Oh, nice, she’s all set up the have some “Hedge Funds” over or maybe one of her Wednesday Night Gay Parties…
Sonja is sleeping in a Dollar Tree Oxygen tent, it’s 2pm and WTF. You know what? A picture is worth a thousand words:
Is the sheeting protecting Sonja or is the sheeting protecting the workers from Sonja?
She doesn’t know what day it is… she’s all out of sorts. Sonja is having work done on the townhouse and is very allergic to all of the dust. Oh, is that why she got divorced? Allergic to that dusty relic?
But not his old money, MisRed is guessing.
Sonja is so happy that Tinsley offered to have Sonja come stay with her for a while. Uh, Tinsley didn’t OFFER, Sonja INVITED herself, and it was supposed to be for two nights, now it’s “a while?”
Sonja says, “I can’t find my underwear.” Why should Thursday be any different than Tuesday or Sunday? Or Friday? Or Saturday? So then she SNIFFS a pair and decides they are dirty.
Sonja is sorting through bills, and there is a stack of them and she has, literally, three dollars in her wallet.
In Flow vs Out Flow
We learn Sonja was called for Jury Duty.
Wait, get a mental image of that for a sec. And now of the attorneys questioning her to see if she is fit to be a juror …
Smokey Eye, Up-do, Gstaad, International Life Style Brand, Pickles, Toaster Oven, Prince Albert, Nigerian Football Club, John-John, Madonna, P-Diddy, The Yacht, The Chateau, Frenchy
Sonja says that she immediately texted Lu when she was arrested, but she isn’t sticking her nose into the situation. Hmmm.
Well other than us seeing that Sonja is even more of a sloppy mess than previously thought, that was a waste of a scene.
Ramona visit a Doctor, something to do with her Skincare line. But she says, “Since my divorce, I don’t HAVE to work, but I like to work.” MisRed is confused. Ramona is the one with the money. It’s not like she got some Kelsey Grammer-esque windfall. MisRed read that Mario got the cash and Ramona got the property. As long as it was south of the highway. Mario had that family jewelry biz, but it’s not like he was on Easy Street. Sleazy Street? Yes. Easy Street? No. Whatever.
Ramona says that people always tell her that she looks like Benjamin Button.
MisRed- OBVIOUSLY- immediately went to Ramona’s website.
So… Ramona’s goop makes you look like a lunatic being photographed through a vaseline-covered lens
Says it’s “arriving in May.” Well, honey, it’s June 7 and it doesn’t seem to be for sale anywhere. You missed your launch date, honey- you should have hired MisRed.
Amway back to the scene, she talks to the Doctor- about how she “becomes a maven” about anything she is interested in, but she goes about it in a very intelligent way.
Intelligent. Really? You?
The look on the Dr’s face is priceless. Someone needs to make MisRed- immediately- a photoshop of Ramona’s face on The Handmaid’s Tale chic- yeah, the wacky Scientologist one. We can call it “The HandMaven’s Tale.”
Ramona says that when she brought up her skincare line to Bethenny, she was MEAN about it. Yeah, well Bethenny’s skin care line was less than successful. It WAS at Walmart… but it isn’t anymore.
I called her a flaming, gaping a$$hole and for some reason, she got offended!?!?
Speaking of Bethenny, she and Kevin, her psychiatrist, are talking about her meeting with Carole, which is scheduled to take place the following day. She reveals that, over Christmas she was feeling depressed and sad and she texted Carole a picture of them and said, “I miss you.”
Awwwww, sweet, right? Nope, she had to Bethenny it…
And then she wrote “You seem cold.” Bethenny!!! You should have just left it at “I miss you.”!!!
Carole texted back “Wow, that’s a lot.” Bethenny texted something else back, we don’t know what, and Carole texted back (allegedly) “Everybody’s got their sh*t. I can’t deal with this. We’ll talk about it next year.”
Oddly, Carole wasn’t clamoring to get back to suckling at the Frankel Friendship Teat.
Next topic with Kevin, Dorinda is very upset with her because she “didn’t thank her properly over a nutcracker.”
We see a flashback of Dorinda telling Bethenny that she found the Nutcracker- and in record time too- as she told her IN THE BERKSHIRES. Bethenny did say “Dorinda, I’m so grateful.” Okay, Okay.
MisRed opinions stands, as law, btw. Still required a Thank You note. Also, I love how Bethenny DOWN PLAYS it to her shrink- that’s she’s mad over “a nutcracker.” It’s not a nutcracker from the 40% off bin Hobby Lobby, this is a GIGANTIC, DISCONTINUED Nutcracker. You know- the kind what you see at Home Goods and say, “Who the f*ck would buy that??!!?” Yep, Dorinda, on Bethenny’s behalf, that’s who.
There’s a giant metal horse in my local Home Goods, maybe Bryn wants that for Flag Day?
We go to the Skinny Girl Jeans party. Everybody is wearing the pajama jeans. Bethenny is excited.
Next in the pipeline: Skinny Girl Circus Wear
Tinsley arrives and wants a glass of red wine, but alas there is no red wine to be found as the bar is stocked with only Skinny girl cocktails.
Sonja enters looking like Nanook of the North.
This is what Sonja wears so she won’t have to turn on the heat.
Might as well have a target drawn on the tip of his weenus.
Sonja makes a beeline for the “hot” bartender and asks him for “an olive.” “My house is under construction and I have no food. And I’m only eating vegetables.”
Oh, for f*ck sake, we are still on THIS??? Next thing you know, Sonja will tell us she’s F*CKING vegan.
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Yes, in her fur hat and fur trimmed coat.
Listen, there is nothing wrong with juicing or being a vegan, but it’s not a requirement for us all to know. Show me a vegan who doesn’t go around telling every single person who crosses their path that they are vegan, and MisRed will show you a LIVE unicorn.
MisRed sidebar: I was throwing a party for my main gay, it was to be a crawfish boil. And this a-hole that we worked with was a vegan. And his wife was vegan. Not that being a vegan made him an a-hole, he was an a-hole independent of his veganism. I KNEW he and the wife were vegan so MisRed mad some vegan apps and a vegan pasta for them for their meal. Cut to 10 seconds later, I see him downing crawfish at a high rate of speed. I said, “I thought you were vegan.” And he says “Oh, I’m a vegan for vanity sake.”
MisRed was like, let me get this straight, you aren’t a vegan because you CARE about animals, you are a vegan because you think it’s the cool thing to do?!?!” Douchnozzle.
Two days later I saw him downing a huge Philly at Tornado Burger and I wanted to punch him in the throat.
MisRed sidebar concluded.
Sonja flags down a waiter and asks if his GARNISH is vegetables… the guy is like- That’s a tomato.
Sonja says “Oh, I’m only eating vegetables.”
We hadn’t heard.
Put that back, Sonja. Tomato is technically a FRUIT. Guess, what, so are Olives. The waiter asks her if she wants a Falafel? Yes, she LOVES falafel. Then says: Are they chick peas? Waiter corrects her saying: They are garbanzo beans. (They are the same thing, people.)
Sonja will put anything resembling a testicle directly into her mouth.
Miss only vegetables is going to eat a fried ball of chick peas.
She then tells the waiter “I’m a little gassy after, but it’s okay.” SHUT UP SONJA.
Then, Sonja spies a Raw Bar and says “Fill ‘er up, Fill ‘er up.” She says the same thing at The Hedge Funds. Then interviews “I’m vegan, but when I’m vegan, I allow myself shellfish, because they’re raw.”
Ok, so Sonja is basically like this A-HOLE at my party. Being a vegan means that you abstain from eating or using anything that comes from animals. Including leather. What about the big old pearl hanging around Sonja’s neck? Oh right, it’s probably from Claire’s, never mind.
Before you get your knickers in a twist, yes, there is SOME support out there for vegans who eat shellfish- but it’s so ridiculously contrived- it’s because bi-valves, technically, don’t have brains. They DO have ganglia which is how they get their systems to function. To MisRed, this is just a vegan loophole.
Listen, do what you want, but don’t run around shouting you are a vegan but then secretly eat bacon in your coat closet. Just live authentically and don’t be a d*ck.
Those are raw shrimp, right Sonja?
Back to Sonja. Maybe Sonja needs to say that she follows a RAW DIET. Frankly, she isn’t even using the Bi-Valve defense, she has no defense. Sonja tries to eat the seaweed “because it looks so good.” SHUT UP SONJA!
Hmmmm… looks a little like…
Hi Kettle, I’m Pot. We’re both black.
Bethenny gives a little speech about Female Empowerment, and MisRed will say, Bethenny has included all sizes in her line, which it a step in the right direction.
Dorinda arrives and finds Tinsley, and Sonja tears herself away from the raw bar long enough to find Tinsley as well.
Bethenny comes up to Dorinda and asks if she is mad at her? Dorinda says she’s over it- but let’s have the conversation and move on. Dorinda says she was sensitive about it and it would have been nice to have been thanked, but she’s over it and she never wants to see another nutcracker again. Bahahaha, yep. Over it. Bethenny says that she probably didn’t thank her, and she should have but “I can’t do everything perfect.”
Then Bethenny goes off ON A TANGENT- about Dorinda getting blasted at the dinner before they went to PR and how Bethenny was a friend to her and Dorinda is like- why are we diverting to that?? Dorinda interviews that Bethenny uses your worst moments against you but brings them up at every opportunity.
Bethenny’s point is that Dorinda was talking about Bethenny behind her back. Dorinda denies it, saying that Carole came down and was like “she didn’t even thank you.” Now Carole is involved.
Bethenny says that Dorinda can’t help but throw somebody else under the bus. Yeah, well, there’s that. Bethenny said that Ramona also said that Dorinda was upset. Dorinda was like- hey Ramona was pissed at you about a bunch of other stuff and was just using that to pile on. Anyway, they hug it out.
Sonja and Tinsley talk about Lu’s arrest and how she went to Palm Beach but probably didn’t realize what it was going to do to her head when she got there. A young bartender brings Tinsley a drink.
Lady Boner: ENGAGED
Sonja, instantly, gets a lady boner, flirting with him and immediately tells the guy that Tinsley has a boyfriend but SHE is single. Sonja does her best flirt asking if he is one of the cute guys Bethenny hired to pose as a waiter?
No, no, I’m just a Skinny Girl at heart. I got this shirt on Etsy.
Honestly, Sonja should just become a hooker. Hear MisRed out. A) As long as the guy has a penis, she is DTF. It does not matter age, personality, weight, looks, brains- she is like: Have penis, Will mount. B) She could make some money. C) It would be more honest than the sexual harassment she is currently doling out left, right and center. Move over, Harvey Weinstein…
Dorinda and Tins talk about Lu- Dorinda says that she never really thought Lu was over the whole situation. Tinsley thinks that Luann wanted to be seen in Palm Beach and to make it seem like she was a-ok, with everything that went down with Tom. Ugh. They say, that everyone has had a bad night and has woken up the next morning and been like “What did I do?!?!!” Do you think that’s what Sonja’s ex-husband did the day after their wedding?
Sonja continues to flirt with the bartender and asks if he has a driver’s license. He does, he’s 26. She tells him that he is older than her last two boyfriends, she says “I had a 23 and a 24.”
She HAD. Not dated. Not for whom I cared. HAD.
This guy, a regular Stephen Hawking says “What do you think about a 26? I’d be right there in the middle.” S.M. H. Check your math, genius.
Then Sonja offers him “Good Breakfast” and says, “I’ll let you to pet my poodle.”
Gross innuendo and seriously, someone TAKE THAT DOG AWAY FROM HER. And where is she going to get “Good Breakfast?” In her Dollar Tree Oxygen Tent?
Sonja interviews that he is not age appropriate for her at all. They either need to be “early 20’s and not needing to live off me, basically.” So, what? They are still living off their parents? “Or I need you to already be established in life. No, no this guy is going to be labor-intensive.”
- What does that even mean in this context? Labor-intensive?
- Sonja is almost old enough to be the GRANDMOTHER of a 20-year-old.
- Since when is Sonja picky? If it has a dick, she is down. Or if it’s Luann, she’s down too.
- Sonja is sad and pathetic. Why would a woman her age want a 23 or 24 or 26 year old boy? To them, she is just a hole.
Sonja is so gross.
Carole arrives for the Bethenny/Carole summit- and Bethenny shows up not too long after, looking like, as Carole says. “The Abominable Snowman.”
Yeah, I finished up with Rudolph and came right over.
How many polyester monkeys had to die for that jacket? Bethenny is very hungover. She comments that Carole had “a very long vacation.” And you know Bethenny is thinking- “What is she vacationing from? She doesn’t work.”
Lu slipping out of her cuffs… classic.
They discuss the Lu situation, and Carole’s favorite part is how Luann slipped out of the handcuffs. Carole says, in her mind, (and in MisRed’s too), Luann was running across the front lawn of the Colony Hotel, screaming, “I’m going to kill you all!” In MisRed’s version, she also has a machine gun.
They agree that it’s no joke.
Bethenny doesn’t really even know what’s going on with her and Carole, but she wants to get to a “new normal.”
Bethenny beats around the bush saying “So are you upset with me? Because I texted you that picture and said ‘I miss you and you’re being cold. And you’re like, “Wow. That’s a lot.” Carole says that she really didn’t think they had shifted, and it was only when Dorinda said something to her about Carole’s lack of support for Bethenny’s PR efforts or anything about Adam. She says she noticed the Bethenny was more of a bitch than usual (MisRed is paraphrasing) but she assumed Bethenny was going through a rough patch. She says that Bethenny really didn’t tell Carole that she asked Adam to go to Houston- and then when she heard about the whole Adam thing from Dorinda, that everything finally clicked into place. The call with Bethenny when she said “Can we be done with Adam already” finally made sense. Carole says she really wanted to talk to Bethenny, in depth- in the Berkshires, but Bethenny wasn’t having it- she just kept saying that their friendship had shifted, and it was natural.
It’s Bethenny’s turn. She says she wasn’t upset at Carole’s contribution to her charity- and says that she is the most honest, up-front person… Carole gives her a look. Bethenny says she was a little taken aback by the whole Adam thing. Carole says that when Bethenny called her she said a LOT of nasty stuff about Adam and Bethenny admits she regrets saying those things and she only did it because she thought “you guys were totally broken up,”
As soon as she said this, MisRed thought- and then Carole echoed, that even if they were totally broken up, she isn’t that kind of person- MisRed took it to mean- the kind of person that would completely BASH an ex, especially an ex where there wasn’t some big event that led to the break-up. (MisRed has an ex that cheated on her on 9/11 and got the chick pregnant…and even I can still find nice things to say about him.) Bethenny says she said those things because she thought they weren’t together anymore.
Bethenny makes a good point- she is like- I never know where these two are- are they together or not together or shacking up or FWB or the Baby Baby-Daddy…
Bethenny admits she has questioned Adam’s motives, but she shouldn’t have said anything and it’s not her business. Bethenny says this was the reason for “the shift.” But Carole says she wasn’t really mad about that- at the time- and it didn’t cause a shift in her mind- and she even said how proud she was of Bethenny for all of her work in PR. Bethenny says that they had “aggressive conversation back and forth” and that this was a different side of Carole, one she had never seen before- she felt there was “a stain” on their friendship.
Carole interviews that what made her most upset was not that Bethenny was saying negative stuff about Adam, it was that she was talking to everybody else BUT Carole.
MisRed sees both sides.
Bethenny DID try to talk to Carole about it- and Carole got her hackles up. However, if we know Bethenny, and we do, it was probably not the most tactful conversation. Bethenny goes off the rails sometimes and Carole was probably like – Whoa, that’s my boyfriend you are talking bout.
ALSO, didn’t Bethenny just get mad at Dorinda for the same thing, with the Nutcracker- talking to other people and not to her.
AND- if these two were such good friends, and Bethenny had legit concerns about Adam, she could, as a good friend, raise her concerns, in a non-aggressive way. Carole may or may not have gotten mad, but that would be showing that you are a good friend. Thick and thin, baby.
Then we get back to the holidays. Carole wanted a little space. Bethenny texted her and said, “I miss you and I feel like you’re being cold.” Which is, basically, shifting the blame onto Carole and her “coldness.”
Carole is like- that’s what YOU said happened, but that’s not what actually happened.
Carole says that she got to LA and she opened her phone and the first thing it said was “You’re being really cold. I don’t understand.” And then Bethenny, allegedly, went in on Carole about Ramona and how horrible she is- and Carole just didn’t want to get into that topic over text so Carole says she replied, and this is the part that Bethenny is leaving out, “This is too big of a conversation for text messaging. Please let’s get together when I am back in New York.” Carole claims that Bethenny did not stop texting, but as soon as Carole got back to NYC, she contacted Bethenny and they are sitting down the next day.
And you KNOW that Bethenny is one of those RAGE / VENTING Texters.
Carole says that she was a little upset that Bethenny would go to Ramona and say that Carole seems sad or lonely over her breakup. Bethenny says she’s allowed to say that. Carole is like- well yeah, but if I felt that you were sad and lonely over your break-up with Dennis, I wouldn’t go to Ramona, I would talk to you directly. Bethenny is like, well if that’s a deal-breaker, I can’t say that I’m not going to do that. Carole says that Bethenny knows that Carole wasn’t sitting around crying over her break-up and the whole thing feels gossipy. Bethenny says that Carole is “debating” her, and Carole says she isn’t, she’s just trying to say how she feels. Bethenny says “I’m sorry that you’re upset,” but Carole is trying to tick off all of the boxes and go point by point so she can “win.” Carole is like- actually that’s what you are doing.
Bethenny is like “What do you want from me? What do you want me to do?” Carole says that Bethenny is the one who brought it up and sent the picture. I wasn’t even upset, and I’m just trying to make you understand. Bethenny says that Carole is just being critical and is picking on her. Carole denies it and says that she’s just trying to explain and create a situation where Bethenny might understand why she was distant toward her when she was in LA- that there is a lot of talk going on and not a lot of it is being said directly to her.
They decide to just hug it out. Carole feels like the convo was circling the drain and it was better to just hug it out.
Carole suggests they go to couples’ therapy.
Back with VeganSonja…oh she’s checking into Chez Tins.
With her Fur Hat and Fur Coat and Leather Bag
Tinsley is happy to reciprocate Sonja’s kindness.
BOOM! Take THAT Lady Morgan.
They sit down and Tinsley says “Here are the rules… there are no rules. When I’m not here, you have to take the elevator.” Flashback to Sonja telling Tinsley to NOT use the elevator because if she gets stuck she can’t get out.
Wait! Do you think Sonja was LYING about having it serviced every year for safety reasons?
Tinsley says that Sonja can have anybody she wants over. The more the merrier.
Flash to Tinsley saying she couldn’t have anybody over at Sonja’s- well yeah, Sonja would have boned them.
Tinsley says that Sonja is more than welcome to have deliveries sent to the hotel and the doorman is more than happy to receive items 24/7. Cut to Sonja yelling at Tinsley for asking Connor to open the door to a delivery person.
Tinsley has a surprise for Sonja- she has rented the penthouse suite for Sonja. Oh, that’s so nice, and I’m sure it has nothing to do with not wanting to share a bed with Sonja or not wanting to catch Hep C. Sonja says that she was REALLY looking forward to being in slippers and PJs with Tinsley- albeit Sonja probably took them out of Tinsley’s closet, but she can’t say no to a suite.
That pizza is RAW right?
And Tinsley gives Sonja an overnight bag… a Louis Vuitton overnight bag.
Vegan Leather, fo sho
Now Sonja can stay off Canal street for a few weeks.
Inside the bag is slippers and a robe, so Sonja won’t steal hers.
Sonja interviews that EVEN FOR TINSLEY this is laying it on a little thick. Then she tells a story that a guest on her yacht, probably PDiddy, gave her a hand painted FAKE Louis Vuitton- and when she went into St. Barth’s she tried to return it but found out it was fake. Bahahahhaha. Figures. Sonja.
Listen Tinsley can’t win. If she doesn’t give, she’s called ungrateful, if she does give she is accused of laying it on thick- and I’m sure Sonja will say that Scott paid for all of this stuff.
love my subtitles
Dorinda goes for a walk and Luann calls. OMG she sounds like more of a man than usual.
Lu says her plan was to go to a wedding in Chile on New Year’s Eve. But she flew to Palm Beach to stay with a girlfriend for two nights and they weren’t even going to go out- and then she was going to Jupiter to have Christmas with her family. Lu says that she thought that she could handle it but all of her emotions kicked in and memories came flooding back. She’s not completely blaming the arrest on that, but it was part of it. She went back to the same places she and Tom used to go, sat in the same seats, and it was too much. Lu wonders why she did that to herself. She says she’s learning a lot about herself in this rehab process. She says she just hit a brick wall.
Ictoria was getting her holiday delousing and I only had one phone call…
She had a hard time telling her kids and especially her mother. Dorinda tries to ascertain what exactly happened- how things went from zero to 60. Dorinda says it could have been a lot worse, she could have hurt herself or someone else.
Lu has hit rock bottom, but she’s thankful for it in a crazy way- because it has forced herself to take a hard look at herself. Is this really rock bottom? Personally, MisRed considers THIS to be the real ROCK BOTTOM:
Next week, Bobby Zarin dies.
Rest in Peace, Bobby.
Tinsley looks at her harvested eggs.
DO NOT let Carole anywhere near them!!
Three hard boiled… no two… no one, and two scrambled, but not touching and one fried, wait…wait…
Can you believe it girls, Carole did not mention running the Marathon ONCE in this episode. So, what do you guys think? Are Carole and Bethenny back together for good? What will the backlash be for Tinsley being nice to Sonja? Will Lu put on a show in jail?
Prisoners of Tom
Prisoners of Tom
Can’t keep our hearts in jail
Oh, you book the yacht
And lose the key
But Tom is
Still at the REGENCY!!!!
We’re still prisoners of TOM!!!
Guess we need to wait until next week to find out.
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