Hello again K-fans. Welcome to another episode of the Krazy Kardashian Klan. In this episode we see Kourtney becoming (?) DIVA-ish, Rob getting his own house (compliments of Kris and Kompany), Khloe’s lips alarmingly plumped and mis-shapen, and Kim still sporting big coats to hide her big baby-body. And, does anyone notice how much Kim touches and picks at her hair? It’s gross. Grab a drink … here we go.
Kris is emojing for all of us watching this show
A scorecard for keeping track
Kourtney is shopping with Corey and Mason at an organic-type grocery store – they are eating and sampling packaged food before deciding whether to buy them. Do people get away with doing that in stores, or just famous people?
Kim is icing her boobs with Khloe’s ice packs. Khloe calls it unsanitary. Notice the Big Shoulders on Kim’s Big Coat. Khloe is blown away that Rob is being so public about his life now that he has a girlfriend (Blak Chyna) – before he hid away. Kim says Blak Chyna gives him confidence (and at least one kind of job.) They are happy that Rob has come around, but they both think Rob should have come clean to the family about his relationship because of the Blak Chyna + Tyga + Kylie connection. Khloe laments where is the “Flip Hair Emoji”.
Khloe is blown away that Rob is being so public about his life now that he has a girlfriend (Blak Chyna) – before he hid away. Kim says Blak Chyna gives him confidence (and at least one kind of job.) They are happy that Rob has come around, but they both think Rob should have come clean to the family about his relationship because of the Blak Chyna + Tyga + Kylie connection. Khloe laments where is the “Flip Hair Emoji” when she needs it.
Well, Khloe, it turns out there is a flip hair emoji — imagine that! And, who does it resemble?
At Kourtney’s — she has prepared a family dinner. Corey and Khloe are there. She has made gluten-free, dairy-free pizza. Kim tells the camera she is jealous that Corey is so close to Kourtney. And, the kids don’t like the pizza.
Gluten-free, dairy-free pizza. Yum! But hard to cut.
“Reign! I’ll save you from the pizza.”
No caption needed
Gluten-free, dairy-free pizza emoji
Kourtney has been asked to shoot the cover for the magazine Architectural Digest – her favorite magazine. It is a dream come true. She has been working on her house for the last two years hoping it would be on the cover. She is obsessed with interior design. But (boo) she is sharing the cover with Khloe and Khloe’s house. They will be the first siblings to be on the cover. (Is that really a milestone?)
Kim is at Kourtney’s. Kourtney has ordered in Big Salads, but Kim doesn’t want one. She is telling Kourtney about a new bed (a Rick Owens bed) she is buying. But she’s not getting a marble one –someone could die if they hit their head on the marble. And marble is not comfy.
A Rick Owens Bed in marble
Kim and Kourtney discuss Rob’s new house – it is right down the street from Khloe’s. But Khloe doesn’t know about it. She’s going to freak out. Rob and Khloe have always been so close and Khloe has been so helpful to him, but she’s hurt that he is not talking to her now.
Kourtney and Khloe are getting primped and made-up at Khloe’s house in preparation of meeting Corey for an evening out. Khloe is tired and doesn’t want to go. Also, Khloe is noticing the relationship with Kourtney and Corey – she thinks it odd.
Look at those lips!
Kylie is at Kris’s and has just learned that you can eat the skin on a kumquat. Kris tries it and says it’s awful. Kourtney brings over the Architectural Digest magazine where she (and Khloe) are on the cover. She doesn’t like a couple of things featured in the magazine that are from Khloe’s house. Now she’s criticizing Khloe’s’ house and saying how she would fix it.
Kim is over at Khloe’s and says she feels like she looks ugly. Khloe says she feels ugly, too. [They say this while they are having minions work on their make-up, hair, and nails.] Kim asks if it’s weird that Corey and Kourtney are so close. They agree that it is inappropriate. There are postings of them together on a hiking trip that looks like a “family” photo.
Kourtney is over at Kris’s. Rob calls. Kris is happy that he’s in a good mood and his sense of humor is showing. He will be moving to his hew house on Wednesday. Rob is getting excited about life again. Kris wants him to gain his independence … so she is going to help him do everything. (What? That makes no sense.) Khloe shows up and Kourtney announces that Mason lost his tooth the previous night and the tooth fairy gave him $100.00. She says that’s all she could find in the house. Sheeze Louise. Khloe says she is coming over to Kourtney’s and knocking her own teeth out.
Kris tells Khloe that Rob is getting a house. Kris denies buying it for him, and Khloe calls it bullshit – says he doesn’t have enough money for a down payment. She is pissed. All these years the family thought Khloe was “enabling” Rob, especially Kris. They all condemned her for it. Now Kris is enabling him. Khloe calls it mind-blowing. Khloe is so pissed that Rob doesn’t even talk to her anymore.
I call Bullshit!
Kourtney and Kim are out to lunch. Kim remarks that she hates crepes –they make her feel like she’s eating a dead body or something. (??) Kourtney likes the consistency. (?? Of a dead body?) Kim asks if it’s weird that Kourtney goes out with Corey on her nights out. Kourtney says it’s not weird. Kim says even though she lives with Corey at her mom’s house, she feels like she doesn’t know him.
Another Big Coat for Kim
At Rob’s new house: Kris is over there planning the landscaping and everything else. She says Rob loves this new responsibility (what? She’s doing everything for him.) Khloe calls. Khloe tells her that her assistants are not available to help with one thing for Rob’s move – her people are too busy doing stuff for her to help out with anything to do with Rob. He has inconvenienced her for the last time.
Rob’s new house
Faye Resnick, interior designer and Kris’s good friend, has been called by Kris to help her in what she calls “Project Rob’. Kourtney is pissed that everyone copies her designs (Kris bought Rob the same coffee cups that Kourtney went out of her way to have herself.) Of course Faye and Kourtney clash over the designs that Faye has done and Kourtney tries to take over. Kris is embarrassed because Faye did all this as a favor to her and Rob and Kourtney is being rude.
Kim sporting another Big Coat
Kim is over at Kris’s. Kris is complaining about Kourtney becoming a diva – she’s so full of herself. Kourtney made everyone feel like idiots at Rob’s house. Kim doesn’t like that Kourtney is the new diva. (Aha!)
Kim is visiting with Corey to try to get to know him better. She says she has so much work to do she cannot function. Corey says he’s busy taking care of “The Queen”. Kim remarks that’s a fun job for him, but why does he like Kris? Corey mumbles a bunch of shit that I cannot catch and then goes on to say that he never had the family dynamic that the K’s have. That explains why he spends so much time with Kourtney and the kids.
In yet another blatant token celebrity appearance, Khloe and Kris go to Mack Sennett Studios to shoot a piece for College Humor with Kris’s friend Rita Wilson. Kris keeps flubbing her lines.
In the car, Khloe and Kris are not wearing seatbelts. Khloe asks about the Rob move. She is still pissed that Rob hasn’t called her at all. Khloe doesn’t understand why Rob has issues now with her after the six years that she has supported him.
Over at Kris’s: Kourtney has trouble opening a banana because it’s non-organic. Kim is eating a big salad. Kris asks where to buy pool towels. Kourtney won’t tell her where she got hers because then she will just copy her. Kris says she needs to talk to Kourtney about her attitude – her being an authority on everything decorating really upset Kris and her friend Faye. Kourtney says her opinion is valued. And most people would be happy to have her advice. Kris is going to hang up her “mover’s hat” – whenever any of her children decide to move – she will not help them anymore.
Another Big Coat
Whose face is on that Big Coat?
Malika is over at Khloe’s house and asks about Rob – Khloe says she still hasn’t heard from him. She says Rob has been her best friend always. She has stood by him and has been loyal. She doesn’t understand how he has cut her off. Malika says that Khloe is the more emotionally stable person – why doesn’t she be the bigger person and call him?
Khloe takes Malika’s advice and tries to call Rob but he doesn’t answer. She goes to see him. She likes his house, but he’s not home. So much for that.
Whoa! Look at those lips!
No one is home except the maid
Next time: Kris has moved Kim out of her house. Kendall is annoyed that her family comes to the city and don’t hang out with her — she doesn’t want to be forgotten just because she works a lot. Rob goes on Instagram to publicly make fun of the food Kris bought him, and Kim gets mad about that, calling him “disrespectful” of their mother.
So K-fans, what did you think? Will it ever get hot enough in Southern California for Kim to shed her coats, or will she have to move to Alaska? Will Kourtney continue to “out-Diva” Kim? Will Khloe’s lips shrink back to normal? Sound off in the comments below.
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