Hola, Trashcans. Apologies for the delay but I had to exorcise my own gay demons by drowning myself temporarily in mezcal and homosexual caballero bars in Mexico. I have trouble articulating the exquisite sadness I felt when I saw Kalorie’s twerking and her best New Mexican drag and it kind of sent me into a downward spiral. But now I’m back. The season continues to unfold and I am finally distinguishing the Kweens from one another.
Instead of doing an epic play by play, I’m going to offer some notes on each Kween that I can remember and I’ll post photos that I took while I was taking a bath of what I believe to be the most poignant moments. I’ll leave some people out, I’m sure, but doesn’t that say everything you need to know?
Is it me or is everyone so much whinier this season? I think the talent level is high but there’s so. much. crying. and. complaining. I am having trouble watching Untucked at all.
The Real MVP of the entire season is The Spider, from the Southside of the workroom. She’s a lace Kween and she saves lives.
This was way to smart for me to create so THANK YOU INTERNET OR REDDIT if you let me know who to credit I will credit them.
Aquaria – strong visual, fine at performing, great at antagonizing, terrible in actual combat. Don’t pick a fight you can’t finish, babygirl.
Blair St. Clair – cute, fun, talented. When’s the other shoe gonna drop? I still think she is the baby that Tempest dropped in season 8, here to seek retribution.
Dusty – finally some confident moments in the Pharmarusical/Beetlejuice runway look, but her gay demon convinced her to wear a truly heinous feather runway ensemble after the app challenge. The demon wins again.
The Vixen – of the South Chicago Wig Borrowing Vixens, is bringing a lot of energy to this season and I mostly enjoy it, especially at the expense of Aquaria, who seems to need some assistance with her personality edges. Maybe this opens us up to teachable growth moments for both The Vixen and Aquaria.
Meh-hem – solid on runway and lipsync but I’m wary of the tears every episode and her weak challenge performances. Is she just not funny? I was very excited to see her pluck her own feathers during her Celebrity Skin lipsync. But I’m not sure she has what it takes.
Kameron – Resembles Chad Michaels? Is not the strongest, but is somehow slowly rolling out some looks and the moral nerve to sustain the pressure of this competition. Total dud in the challenges. Does she have no personality or is she cunningly reserving her strength?
Kalorie – We lost Vanjie for this. She’s not forgettable, but not ready for this competition and she probably never will be. And I’ve never seen someone who feels such pressure to represent her home state. I don’t think I’ve heard the words “New Mexico” so many times in my life cumulatively. So head back to the Land of Entrapment, Kalorie, where “YOU ARE SOMEBODY.” I’d pay to see you. Do they serve chilaquiles Christmas style at your gay bar? If so, I’ll DEFINITELY see you.
Eureka – after a rough PharmaRusical, she’s pulling it together for the App challenge and feather runway. INTO IT. Disney villain runways forever.
Miz Cracker – Safe but consistently funny, yet somehow slipping into the herd. Perhaps because Aquaria and The Vixen conflict is the bloodier battle?
Monique – I’m interested in this discussion of the unique pressures of being black and gay and doing drag. Sometimes I wish that World of Wonder would organize more formal discussions of these and other topics that we don’t get time to dive into during the show. Also, a conversation moderated between the gals who have transitioned officially after the show. Also, I loved the Cookie Monster look. The exposed cleavage padding is not my thing.
Asia – I really have not been that impressed with her, but her Butterface performance is one of those moments when a Dallas pageant Kween proves that she can be funny. I REALLY didn’t want to like Kennedy, which was the last season I recapped, but she’s proven herself time and time again. Maybe Asia is similar.
Yuhua – Maybe she just can’t stand not being pretty? That’s sad. Good luck!
Andy Cohen is a dud in all televised content besides WWHL (which I’ve never seen but I’m assured is worth watching if you like seeing him grandstand.)
I want Alyssa Edwards in EVERY EPISODE as a coach for the gals.
I want Courtney Love eating a cake in every episode (have you ever read her food diary? It’s the best thing ever.)
WHO IS NICO TORTELLINI??? I could google it, yes, but instead, I’m going to watch Dragula and Wikipedia Prader-Willi syndrome.
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