A MESSAGE FROM EARTH
Earth date May 14, 2014
Greetings Commander Stolimpatchen,
As per your instructions, we are sending back the first of our planned 13 week transmissions on the study of male primates in the locale of “America” on this little planet. It is our intent to alter the previous comical perception Earth has held within the multiverse by discovering intelligent life.
Our air cameras have been targeted on specific males of the hominid species (genus homo). Surprisingly, they seem to have detected our observance and happily cooperate with our attempts to study them by making eye contact with our equipment and re-hashing the events just recorded. This has helped our study tremendously. Our focus of this study is to discover the mating rituals of the species, as well as sexual habits.
Subject #1 is called “Marcus” in his language. He shall hereafter be referred to as Subject M. He is 36 years old. His focus is the female of the species and as such he has created an on-line persona called FitArtist. To refresh your memory, on-line is the term for their use of an internet, much like our antiquated communication systems from the last millennium.
Cultural expectation is for a male and female to perform a ceremony called a marriage, which is supposed to bind them together forever. When this ceremony is rescinded, it is called a divorce.