Top Chef Trashies this episode had me hitting the summer sausage and beer holiday leftovers hard because I was so sad by the end.
Uncle Brucie wakes Non-mustachioed Joe with a protein shake, telling him he slept really hard buddy and he needs to replenish. He’s already a total dad. They all are having a hard time receovering from the camping and high altitude but no one has it harder than Lee Anne. She is not well and in the bathroom she confides in Little Miss Witch that she had a hard first trimester and right now she feels super shitty. She has a headache she can’t shake and is dizzy. Claudette tells her that she needs to take care of herself because she only has one body and that one baby. She said she did that all at 18 and she can’t imagine doing that now.
Tanya calls her dad. She says hanging with chefs all the time just isn’t something she does and she is having a hard time. Thankfully Lee Anne is taking the warning signs her body is giving her and decides to be checked out so she is sitting out today. It’s a good thing she did because the EMT tells her that her blood pressure is high and that can have serious negative effects on her baby, off to the hospital they go.
As the chefs walk into the kitchen for the Quickfire they are greeted by Big Mouth Blais or Second Chance Dick, whichever you prefer, Scar and a giant chalkboard. Scar gives them a little update on Lee Anne and Le Bernardin does a silent prayer and crosses herself.
Scar says that chef have a tendency to complicate things but today is all about simplicity.
Vanna please flip the chalkboard
The chalkboard lists each chef and a dish off their own menus that also takes a long time to make. Scar explains that theses days you cant scroll through Facebook without seeing a Buzzfeed Tasty video that takes restaurant quality dishes and makes them approachable for the home chef.
Without removing the sense of authorship
The winner for the Quickfire will earn immunity AND have their recipe featured in a Buzzfeed Tasty video. Baby Bear says this is awesome, because you would be able to make your Instagram followers quadruple. She wants to be a social media star.
The chefs are scrambling because the 30 minutes include gathering their ingredients isn’t much time. Little Miss Witch is beating the shit out of her octopus to try and break it down before grilling. Baby Bear is doing a dish from her stand and that is her first memory of Scar cooking. I did not know Scar even cooked. Le Bernardin is struggling with her hush puppies. Stacho is not even going to attempt gnocchi in the short amount of time and instead is going to make a dumpling with all the ingredients. He is positive that this is going to be his first Quickfire win.
B.Funk is going to make pepper pot shrimp with polenta instead of rice given the time. He wants to win because his daughters would thinks its so cool. Brother is sweatin his paella. Le Bernardin asks Claudette how she is doing and it’s nice to see that despite their bad start they are able to keep it kosher in the kitchen. With 20 second left Claudette is flipping tortillas and running to get her octopus but only the pineapple salsa makes it onto the plate.
Scar tells her obviously she can’t win this one but to Secnd Chance Dick’s credit he does take a bite.
Blais compliments his epic mustache. Scar looks mildly amused at the thought of scallop gnocchi dumpling
Scar gives her best, “do you think a home cook could do this?” because you barely did
No comment but raised eyebrows at store bought puff pastry
Scar asks if this is supposed to be a savory dish and Blais tells her that is could have used more chilies. Scar tells her it could have also used more salt.
Blais compliments her toasted bread and she says she likes toasted bread a lot. Riveting.
In the corner the camera pans to Le Bernardin eating her dish, she must be worried based on the comments.
Scar asks him if this is how he likes his duck and he says no.
Blais likes spicy food but he wonders if the home cook would be into it, B.Funk says the Carribean folk definitely would and based on the popularity of sriracha I think there are a lot of spicy lovers.
Dick thinks its green and almost bitter.
Blais asks if she thinks this a good representation of her food and she says yes and that the buttermilk chicken is something almost everyone can connect with but also includes the bold flavors of Pakistan.
In the bottom:
Claudette for obvious reasons. Le Barnardin’s hush puppies, were too large too sweet and almost gummy. Scar also wants to call out Baby Bear. Last week she made great western food that was flavorful, she wants to know why she is cooking “our” food like that. Initially I thought she meant the judges food but I realize now she means Indian/Pakistani food. To say she is crushed is an understatement.
B.Funk’s pepper pot, lot of flavor a nice rounded and dynamic dish. Brother’s paella, in a short amount of time he was able to develop a lot of depth and the chorizo gave it umami. Stacho’s potato scallop dumpling calling in incredibly creative. The winner is….
That’s whats up
Second Chance Dick leaves the kitchen and I am kind of surpised, usually when he comes around he is there for the whole episode.
Scar asks them whose ready to party!
Poor Le Bernardin she looks beaten down
Scar welcomes celebrated German chef Keegan Gerhard.
I can’t be the only one whose mind went to this Gerdardt
Brother Luck says that Keegan is celebrated pastry chef in Denver and he is excited that he is the guest judge for this challenge.
Keegan says Colorado is all about being outside. Scar says in that spirit they will be throwing a German festival Top Chef style. Chef Keegan was raised in Germany until he was 13 so all his early food memories are from there. Their challenge today will be to elevate German food AND to create a radler accompaniment.
For 200 guests
Keegan says that radler is what some might call a summer shandy, it’s a combination of beer and some sort of fruit soda. Stacho says where hes from ordering a radler would earn you a kick in the nuts. Oh because its not a PBR or Old Style, gotcha. Baby Bear had never made German foor or heard of a radler. For some exposure and learning field trip they will be going to Chef Keegan’s restaurant for German food and beer in their BMW X5’s.
The place looks awesome and Brother notes it smells like beer, sausage and pretzels basically big guys heaven. So, interestingly we find out that B.Funk does not drink and is relying on Stacho to interpret the flavors and he stays on brand saying it tastes like a San Pellegrino Limonata. Not for religious reasons but because he is a recovering alcoholic and hasn’t had a drink in three years. Wow, just as they were announcing the challenge my thought was what if someone doesn’t drink. They sit down and feast with Chef Keegan on lots of meat and what they call the best streudel they have ever had.
On the way to Whole Foods Uncle Brucie expresses concern about Lee Anne given that he is baby centered right now. Then Brother delivers the most interesting item about himself, that his parents were excotic dancers who toured Asia and his dad’s stage name was….
He says that Asian culture was really magical for them and his life had a lot of Asian influences so he is going to do a spring roll with German ingredients.
They hit Whole Foods with 30 minutes to shop and $600 to spend. At the meat counter Non-mustachioed Joe asks Tanya if it trues she dated a German Prime Minister and she laughs like there may be some truth to that rumor. She however very excited about this challenge as she feels her European experience translates to this challenge very well. B.Funk is struggling though and says that this challenge is taking his deep, dark, non-funky head space where he ends buying sausages and pre-made pretzel rolls.
At the hospital Lee Anne calls her fiancé from the bed and he sounds so worried as he asks about the baby.
The baby is fine but she was sufferieng from dehydration and altitude sickness. She wants to compete but knows that would be putting her body and baby at risk.
In the kitchen the chefs are dashing about to get prep going. Le Bernardin is tired of cooking other peoples food and is now starting to get into her own creative space. Bruce is doing an Italian dish with Bavarian flair including a cherry mustard that sounds all kind of wrong but I bet is good AF. Brother is making spring rolls that sound sort of like the disgusting southwestern egg rolls Chili’s makes that are my secret shame. Stacho is making a huge mess.
Tanya is working on her pork croquettes that will have a touch of creole spice that she calls Tanya flavor. Baby Bear is making a cake and shares that for some reason Black Forest Cake is huge in Pakistan and a mainstay in every bakery. I love random notes like this about cultures.
Big Daddy and Chef Keegan appear stopping first to see B.Funk. Daddy doesn’t look thrilled about his dish and when Chef Keegan asks him which beer he chose B.Funk admits its light, but he doesn’t drink so the team helped him out on the flavors. Daddy tells him he better hope they don’t try to screw him. Stacho is the next stop where Tom psyche’s him out asking if he thinks that is enough to feed 200 people. Denver is making a David Hasselhoff potato and that is awesome. She knows David us HUGE in Germany and combined that idea with Hasselback potatoes.
Back at the hosue the chefs arrive to find Lee Anne eating for two alone in the kitchen. Uncle Brucie and Little Miss Witch are the first to give her hugs but then she announces that the doctor told her she needs to return to regular altitude. So, she is bowing gracefully out of the competition. Claudette is bummed because she felt she was one of the few chefs that she is bonded with.
The chefs arrive at an amusement park in downtown Denver to set-up and just as they are getting to it the sky turns gray. None of the chefs are pleased at this point with the wind blowing and all feeling unsure of their dishes. Big Daddy have split for this tasting. She will be working the line with Chef Keegan and Tom will be with Graham.
Scar says it makes her want to drink more beer
This is the face Scar made when she drank Brother’s radler
Keegan comments that the sausages are dried out and overdone
Tom tells her needs more salt
Scar and Keegan bothe do not like her radler saying it tastes flat but Scar gives her major props for the cake.
Graham totally gets the David Hasselhoff reference but Tom gags on her radler from the spice of the jalapenos. They do however love her kraut.
Both Keegan and Scar agree that the apple and ginger made the radler too sweet and Keegan did not get any cheese from the sauce only apple.
Tom and Graham really like the texture and say its good.
In the stew room B.Funk is feeling sorry for himself and because of the beer, drinking and reminders of bad decisions and Little Miss Witch tells him he has to get out of that headspace.
Overall Big Daddy thought they all did really well, however it all about Chef Keegan’s opinion. He says they took ssome food and radlers place they have never been before and he liked the way they attacked the challenge.
Chef Keegan really liked Tanya’s radler and appreciated that she treated the two like a pairing. Graham really liked Claudette’s it had nice heat. Chef Keegan loved the pepper ash that she used was delicious and calls it somewhere between cozy and a hug. Tom thought the spaetzel was really well-cooked and the cabbage was great. The winner is…..
Tanya says something really interesting in her accepatance speech, that the more people see someone like her doing this the more she will inspire others to do it too. In my research on her before the show started she had a lot of not so great things to say about Food Network and her previous experience on TV. They really wanted her to be a sassy black woman and she did not like that at all. In addition to winning the challenge she also won a trip sponsored by BMW to Palm Springs.
In the bottom:
Big Daddy felt that frying after braising really dried out the meat for Stacho. Chef Keegan says that he is like a guy with bag of tricks bigger than her can lift and part of being a good chef is discipline. Scar asks Brother with less disdain than usual when she lays down her scarism, if he was happy with the way his dish came out. He was because he thought that Chinese cabbage was unique and it really expressed who he is. Tom says the dish did no read German at all and Graham tells him the challenge was not who could make the tastiest dish. Scar asks Le Bernardin if she was happy with the flavor of her dish and because everyone has been complaining about her seasoning she knows to say she could have added more salt. Big Daddy reminds her that is this is not the first time they have told her this and she says that the chef she worked for previously said if it tastes good to you it is probably to salty. Tom tells her to erase that memory and is mentally texting Eric Ripert to ask if he really said that.
They dismiss the chefs. Tom says that this really comes down to Brother not doing the challenge, Le Bernardin’s dish was bland and Stacho overcooked his meat. Scar points out that Le Bernardin’s fish was perfectly cooked and that despite not rising to the challenge Brother’s was the yummiest. But Graham and Tom argue that he did not do the actual challenge and….
Brother is out
He is determined to make it back to the competition and well the kitchen got HOT during his Last Chance Kitchen.
Did you guys like this challenge or did it feel forced? In some respects if felt like Chef Keegan said he would come on the show and they were like German festival, let’s do it up. Next week is Top Chef olympics and uh it looks like things between Tanya and Little Miss Witch get complicated.
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