The Verge – Wings, Girls…
Blessed be the fruit! The trailer for Season Two of Seth MacFarlane’s adorably plucky animated sitcom about a misogynist dystopia, The Handmaid’s Tale, is here! You KNOW when they have some angelic choir creepily singing a cover of some catchy old protest song that this shit is gunna be fun for the whole family.
Hahahaha will women ever learn? Anyway, I’m really excited about this show coming back because I need the daily reminder of where we as a society will inevitably be in two months and why I probably shouldn’t plan on having children. If you want to catch up on the first season, make sure you check out my glowing review:
I have no idea why Rolling Stone hasn’t offered to hire me yet.
NY Daily News – Bye Bye, Bobby 🙁
Real Housewives’ of New York‘s own Bobby Zarin passed away over the weekend following a lengthy battle with cancer, and that it a very sad thing. Bobby was the one palatable and rational part of a woman who is too easy to snark at, so I’ll refrain from saying anything about her in this post. Funeral services for Bobby were held this morning at the Riverside Memorial Chapel in Manhattan, and were attended by former and current New York Housewives Sonja Morgan, Ramona Singer, Aviva Drescher (I must throw out a contractually obligated “Thank You, Reid”), and Kelly Killoren Bensimon, as well as New Jersey Housewife Danielle Staub, Millionaire Matchmaker Patti Stanger, and former Trump bride Marla Maples. (Damn, Bobby really was a martyr for the company he kept.)
And finally, in a poetic form of irony, Ms. Bethennia Frankel of Skinnington Girl Heights, who alighted from her carriage on this cold and gray New York morn to say goodbye to her dear friend. And not at all whatsoever to be photographed with or speak to his very toxic widow.
Celebitchy – Aw Man, A Good One Goes Down
Aziz Ansari, a hilarious animated chipmunk that happens to write amazing stand-up and one of the smartest television shows in modern history, has been accused of sexual misconduct. In an interview with a blog called Babe, a young anonymous woman with the alias Grace (ha, I get it) details a night she shared with Ansari when she was 22. On the Cute Lil’ Puppy-to-Harvey Weinstein Scale of Harassment, Ansari’s alleged behavior wasn’t criminal, but it was unquestionably coercive, inconsiderate, and systemically endemic to the rape culture that we’ve all grown up in. Of course, this means that the story’s been met with tons of “not that bad!” outcry, and Aziz has issued an apology in response, so, I dunno. I’m just so tired.
Jezebel – Stop It, Already!
It’s a pretty slow news, day folks. What can I say? If you’ve got the day off today, I hope you’re spending it well. Sitting on the couch, day drinking mimosas well until it’s no longer appropriate, binge watching This Is Us in an effort to lose seven pounds of water weight through your eyeballs. Anyway, if you’re spending it like me, take my advice and Bobby Finger’s and follow Sonja Tremont Morgan on Instagram. It’s an endless parade of mirth.
Take some damn insulin, why don’tcha!
CNN – Finally, On a Sad Note
Delores O’Riordan, lead singer of The Cranberries, died yesterday in London at the age of 46. I’m sure all of you grandparents out there, like me, will have some impenetrable, perfect 90s memory that somehow revolved around the sound of Delores’ voice. For me it was my mom driving us around in the station wagon, blasting her Cranberries tape as loud as it would play, hollering along with Delores’ yodel with a joyous but completely tonedeaf voice.
Rest in Peace, lady, and thanks for rides in the car with Mom so fun.
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