We did it, Trashii Talkers! We made it through the season, we kept our snark protected, we made it through the season, we kept on being rude, we made it through the season and found ourselves infected by Jeff Probst’s view….I wish he’d screw….himself in the poo(pershooter)….
No, no, merely shitty.
Sorry, Trashii Talkers. I just can’t help myself sometimes. Be glad I occasionally edit myself because there was about four more rhymes here before I cut them out. It’s my Christmas present to you! Mazel Tov!
Anyway….there are three hours of TV to get through (four if I count the OUAT recap I have to do after this one) and dicking around with rhymes ain’t gonna get it wrote!! So on to the show!!
We start where we always do in these finale shows…with an extended recap of the entire season. You know, for those people that just decided to start watching now. Or ones with memory issues…
Once that is over, we pick up with Kissyermama returning to camp after the booting of Hayden. Ceira is disappointed that things didn’t go according to plan, but she’s holding out hope that her challenge beast mama will kick ass in the next truel and rejoin her in the game. They’re gonna kick some ass when that happens. No matter what the numbers say.
Tyson tells us he knows that going to the end with Monica and Gervase is his best shot at winning. He’ll even use the hidden immunity idol to keep Monica loyal to him if he has to.
He tells her she can have it since he’s not planning on using it; have it as a souvenir for her kids or whatever. Monica refuses to take it, telling Tyson it’s his; he found it. He’s really worried that whoever comes back from Pissed Off Island will woo Monica over to their side.
For her part, Monica tells us that Monica is not Tyson and Gervase’s lap dog. She’s a big dog, yo! She’s open to staying with Tyson and Gervase OR switching sides.