Sorry for the delay guys! I was busy stalking C.T.
Anyways… In the last episode, MTV left us with a thrilling cliffhanger… Which one of the kayaks capsized? Well it really wasn’t that thrilling since I was indeed correct about Jordan/Marlon capsizing. The capsizing secured the victory for everyone’s least favorite team of Johnny “I ate too many Bananas” and Frank the spaz. Johnny struggled so much to get on the boat, I thought they were actually going to need a crane to pull him up. I’m sure at that moment, C.T./Wes turned to each other with a giant grin and were like “Yeah, we totally got this.”
After enjoying drinks on the yacht, the next morning the Dullest-Host-in-Television History explains the rules for the final. For most of it I tuned him out, but what I did gather is that they would have to complete five checkpoints in order to collect some golden elephant. Also, they would be going to Nightmare Island instead of Dream Island. Wow MTV! How do you come up with such extremely creative and innovative names?
In order to get to Nightmare Island, they have to swim and Cara Maria is not happy about this. For some reason the girl can stick any piece of metal in her nose, but if any water gets in there she freaks out. The first checkpoint involves some sort of bamboo stick puzzle game. Watching this game made me understand why it was called “Nightmare Island” because it is a nightmare to watch.
C.T./Wes complete the puzzle easily because C.T. plays a similar game at his favorite breakfast spot when he’s hungover. If anyone indeed knows what restaurant this is, feel free to private message me so I can try it some time and most likely have a restraining filed against me.
Wes/C.T. make it to the second checkpoint where they have to break through a fence and solve some hypotenuse formula. Seriously MTV? Please tell me you’re trying to prank us or something by coming up with the most boring challenges imaginable. I mean what’s next? A sewing competition? Surprisingly, C.T. is the one who figures out the equation by doing some sort of multiplication in the sand. I don’t know about you, but I’ve always felt ridiculously good looking people should never have to waste their time doing math.
Cooke/Cara Maria are the next team to finish the puzzle and have a nice lead on Paula/Emily. Meanwhile, Johnny/Frank are bickering with each other and every time they cut to Johnny running he looks like he has to take a massive dump. Cooke/Cara Maria have no idea how to complete the geometry equation, but Cooke is wise enough to cut the same rope that C.T./Wes did and they are able to advance to the next checkpoint.