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Named for lurid serialized stories (so like today's reality TV) that sold for a penny a copy in Victorian Britain, former National Spelling Bee finalist and multiple Science Fair award winner PennyDreadful has been mercilessly skewering reality TV since 2011, and cites MST3K as inspiration. Follow PennyDreadful on Twitter at @kcvinweho.
  • Justelle

    I took no issue with the bite thing. It seemed like a silly inside joke that became a dorky family tradition. I have enough dorky stupid inside jokes with my Mr. to not think to much of it. Besides it sounded like he called her up to make a connection with her “Find something to bite” Not like the whole family sits around while he is at work waiting for him to call so they can have dinner.

    I have no issue with there being different kinds of polygamy. Some that share a drive way or a kitchen or a bedroom. There are lots of kinds of monogamous marriages so whatever floats your boat there. But it totally seems like the Captain wanted to do it, then wandered through scripture til he found what he wanted. If you just want to do it because it works for you…then do it. You don’t need to justify it for me sir. I feel bad for the lady who has never gotten pregnant. Shes basically just signed on as an extra nanny.

  • beachgirl

    @ The Critic
    So lining the kids up like Captain Von Trapp, and controlling how they eat and guilting his wife #1 into his having a couch companion, because wife#1 was too busy keeping house for him and all the kids she bore him to laze around with him on the couch, seems nice?

    I’m not trying to be critical of you, Critic. When I saw the lining up thing, I thought, well, in tornado country, it’s probably a good thing to make little kids practice some summons that requires immediate obedience as a matter of life and death, no arguments. The bite thing was odd, polygamy is odd but if it’s mutual…

    But the more I see of these polygamy guys, the more I think they are watered down versions of the perps on Law and Order SVU, that have a women in a box under their bed, and get their jollies controlling when she can go to the bathroom. The dress it up with the Bible, but in the end, polygamy seems like just another sick way for weak men to play god by devaluing women, or at least by setting themselves up as higher. I think it feels creepy because it is creepy.

  • Hatched One

    It’s like that old joke: Every woman’s dream is to have two men at once, one cooking and one cleaning.

  • notwithoutmyTV

    I want THREE Marias: One to be loving mother to our children and provider of tasty food, one to be sexual playground equipment in bed, and one that’s good with animals. Because my dogs don’t mind for shit.

  • kelli3222

    Hilarious recap Ms PennyDreadful, I thought exactly the same when those poor kids introduced themselves, yep, Sound of Music! Loved it! Ok, who’s wondering if the favorite wife is really pregnant or it’s just a tease next week? If she is, can’t wait to watch QM talk about how she’s just so happy for fave wife! :)

  • Merry

    I could care less if the Von Trapps want to share a bed or practice synchronized eating: what ticked me off was the Captain’s comment about wanting two Marias, one to work and one to sit with him. The only correct response to that is to smack the bastard upside his sexist head and tell him to get off his ass and HELP her! He could have his wife next to him AND get the work done much quicker…what a concept. It’s clear that these lazy man-children just want multiple wives to wait on them and the Bible is a handy excuse.

    Kody’s uneducated bigotry is getting worse. He demands acceptance of his “lifestyle,” but has put zero effort into understanding other cultures and religions, or even basic history. I don’t despise him for being polygamist: I despise him for being lazy, useless, and willfully stupid.

  • Justso

    Can you say freaky? OMG> Kody totally involved with himself. What a sad, sick and disgusting show. Never watching again. Start running Janelle and never look back at this nighmare!

  • nettaboo

    Kody didn’t say the prayer right, several Jewish people commented on twitter that his pronunciation was wrong and that Jehovah or Yahweh are never supposed to be said out loud. He had to apologized.

  • Jackie

    LOLOL! Great recap! I was SO mad at that Richards guy, badgering his poor wife into a lifestyle that clearly made her insecure and uncomfortable. It seemed pretty clear to me that he just wanted another wife. I felt so badly for that little Von Trapp girl! It seems like only 2 of the 9 kids were born after wife #2 came into the picture, and this family wasn’t originally part of a polygamist culture, so could you imagine being one of the older kids and being told, “Now you’re going to have an additional mommy to co-parent and discipline you, and we’ll be hiding our lives from the world starting…now!” Oh, and I think the wives said that they called each other “BFFs.”

  • Janine

    I found it amazing that, when Von Trapp wife number one, said that being barren was a choice, Von Trapp wife number two didn’t slap her upside the head.

  • Lizbot

    Loved this recap, and the tie-in to Sound of Music made it even more entertaining! Thanks for that.

  • The Critic

    Oh – and I could not believe Kody when he interrupted the prayer to show off that he could say it in Hebrew. That was incredibly rude! What an a$$. I bet the Richards never invite the Klowns back.

  • The Critic

    I guess I’m the only one who liked the Richards family. They seemed like a really nice family. The first bite thing is weird but at least they have family meals together. I feel bad for the second wife not getting pregnant after five years. It must be torture for her. :(

    Kody is so hyper and obnoxious. I don’t know how the SWs put up with him.

  • amandalee27

    You’ve never played red rover??? Excellent game for elementary school passive aggressiveness.

    The Von trapps seem like hippy dippy three way humpers.

    Did anyone else see that old pic they flashed–Janelle has really lost a lot of weight/shaped up. It ain’t easy-love her!

  • Heather Keet

    That first bite thing is CRAZY. And not like, they’re different and I’m a bit freaked out. But like CRAZY because I don’t get people who take the bible so literally that they can’t do shit without stopping the rest of their life to do it.

    I went to a Lutheran School my whole life, religion was always there, but these “literal interpreters” are why I fled the scene. I mean, why don’t I just trek across a desert for 40 years….

    ~heather~ click my name above to enjoy some hilarious reading!

  • beachgirl

    Can’t watch this show anymore – it’s so boring that after a few minutes I just zone out — but I look forward to your recaps.

    I was hoping for a screen capture of Christine’s belligerent, arms crossed, scowling face when she is meeting the Von Trapps for the first time – the kid behind her was no more friendly. For all the Clowns expect tolerance toward them, they, and Christine in particular are very suspicious and judgmental. What a puss!

    Also thought the Clowns ribald post visit comments about the Von Trapps eating habits out of line. They hosted you. Denigrating them for their odd ways is a bit much from those who crow loudly about persecution themselves. Plus, I don’t remember the Von Trapps saying anything out of line about the Clowns, (though I could have missed it, bored into unconsciousness as I was). And for a group of people that prate on about religion, the Clowns certainly have an odd way of spending money like water on frivolous crap, rather than do good works. Or does Kody think that gold convertible is a chariot to the gods?

    I suspect the eating thing, as well as the “sharing a bed” stuff, was manufactured drama for the show. But who knows.

    As for Mr. Von Trapp, did it ever occur to him to get his lazy ass off the couch and help his wife in the kitchen (how many kids did she give him?) rather than whine about how he is all alone in front of the TV? That, rather than finding a bible justification for wifey #2, would have been a better answer to poor abused him.

  • Umpuleeze

    Hilarious as usual! Anyone else buying the sharing of the bed with 2 women as religion? I see it as a guy who decided one wife couldn’t wait on him fast enough. Douche.

  • Hatched One

    Absolutely hysterical recap! Every time I see Kody, the same thought runs through my mind “I just don’t get it”