Princesses Long Island Recap: Hot Ass Messes | TrashTalkTV

Princesses Long Island Recap: Hot Ass Messes

Last week, we met damaged Casey who couldn’t get over having her high school boyfriend stolen by Erica. Ashlee freaked out over a stain on her bed and Chanel tried and failed to give these girls some religion. Oh, Amanda and Jeff continued to be weirdos and Joey was pretty normal.

This week, we pick up at the Casey and Erica fight. Casey decides to go outside and ruin what’s left of Erica’s sanity. Casey tells her that she lives with what Erica did every day. After all, Erica is known for boyfriend stealing sluttery but Erica says that she is not. Last week, I meant to mention that I suspected some abuse or molestation but it was in the comments. It’s possible that she drinks, smokes, does drugs and bangs like a sailor as a result of some genetic disposition but it’s not out of the question to think that some of this destructive behavior is linked to something deeper. Casey doesn’t want to be phony because deep down inside she wants to punch her in the effin’ face. Her desire is actually closer to the surface than she thinks. Erica apologizes for not buying the last Delorean on eBay and for making Casey waste her Fashion Bug prom dress but she has changed in so many ways.

Princesses Long Island 6.16.2013 erica is so hot “Now I learn a guy’s last name before I go down on him.” Casey says that she still sees erratic, irresponsible behavior. Guess what y’all? Erica breaks it down and says that Casey isn’t her best friend and doesn’t know what she’s been through. OMG, why can’t these two just pinky swear to get along, trade Tamagotchi and move on with their lives.  Best friend? Don’t know what I’ve been through? This whole thing sounds like a 1994 episode of Jenny Jones. Casey doesn’t want to know what she’s been through and doesn’t care. After all, Casey’s parents are divorced and after Erica stole her man, it made her question if every man leaves the woman. Erica realizes that sorry isn’t good enough. Casey acknowledges as much and is done with the conversation.

Princesses Long Island 6.16.2013 erica making “If you leave me here, I’ll kill myself.”

Princesses Long Island 6.16.2013 ACasey not giving a “Congratulations. You’ve finally made a decision we can both get behind.” Did you notice that Casey took her headband off as she walked into the kitchen? I think it’s some kind of  Jewish super power source or maybe it’s what keeps Casey and Chanel’s hair blonde. Either way, I’m buying one this weekend.

Casey struts back into the house now that she has the comfort of knowing Erica is one English class away from composing a thorough suicide note. Erica ambles in apologizing for being a dickhead in high school or even now and for who she was or is. I hope they don”t let her take a bath alone tonight.

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20 comments on “Princesses Long Island Recap: Hot Ass Messes

  1. Churble says:

    My vote for worst quality: A complete lack of understanding of the definition of the word “sexy”

    I did enjoy the editing which cut almost immediately from her calling Jeff sexy to a shot of him laying down with MAJOR plumber’s crack. Love the editing, Bravo.

  2. BelowSeaLevel says:

    Casey telling Erica she wanted to punch her in the face could be one of my favorite reality t.v. scenes. I wish they’d lose those headbands.

  3. misskris4 says:

    @Churble I almost forgot about Jeff’s coin slot shot! I think that’s when I changed the channel.

  4. L Boogie says:

    Ugh! @Churble, I had a screenshot of Jeff’s crack! I forgot to use it. I figured we should all suffer together. Glad you guys caught it! @BelowSeaLevel, I officially loved Casey after that comment.

  5. stinkyhousewives says:

    These women look like a bunch of pelicans! What honkers. Oy.

  6. MisRed says:

    I watch a LOT of bad TV… but I ALMOST can’t watch these idiots. ALMOST. Erica fell out the hot mess tree and hit every limb on the way down… twice.

  7. labowner says:

    WTF? No mention of Jeff picking out Amanda’s clothes and calling each other mommy and daddy.

    Casey you think about it every day for 10 years? Comparing it to that of her parents. Bad blondie. What an idiot who needs to spend the rest of her life on a coach.

    Love Joey. She reminds me of Carla from Mob Wives.

    Dad buys me lingerie? Sick, gross, all kinds of wrong and disgusting. Boundaries people. Learn them, know them, live them.

  8. L Boogie says:

    @labowner, that’s why I need you guys. Seriously, I passed out 2 nights in a row, hands on keyboard just trying to keep up with this. Some shows can be glazed over but this one literally needs a transcript to catch all of the insanity. I caught that Amanda/Jeff exchange but I swear these two are in in the joke and are just trying to freak America out. Chanel was way too eager to share the lingerie story. I hate to admit it but I kinda get where Casey’s coming from. I would, however, be able to be cordial when in the presence of my “Erica”. I like Joey a lot but I sensed some sh*t stirring tendencies with that bulimia remark. Overall, I’m enjoying these freako weirdos.

  9. labowner says:

    I see Babs offering herself as “mommy” to Jeff. If they do get married and have kids, he is going to leer at all the girls inappropriately as an extra sick and twisted old man.

  10. sfs614 says:

    How about when Erica said about 5 times “I’m sick of people telling me what to eat”. Add that to her list of disorders.
    This show and this blog make me laugh soooo hard.
    Team Jeff as my favorite “character”
    (p.s. did you see him, and his shit eating grin, bartending on WWHL? Love!)

  11. smango smango says:

    @L Boogie – I sincerely hoped the crack shot would have been the featured photo. It was like a train wreck!! This guy is recap GOLD.

    I couldn’t stop laughing at Chanel’s rap (@ Macy’s is where I spend most of my days!) and the whole part about Erica tripping over Jeff’s cat burglar bag. Holy crap!! HILARIOUS!!!

  12. jenbug79 says:

    Not just plumber’s crack…very furry plumber’s crack. *Shudder*

  13. jenbug79 says:

    @LBoogie- I completely agree with your predictions of what is to come for the ladies. I too like Joey, but her frankness is bound to cause drama.
    I almost couldn’t watch Amanda and Jeff’s pool scene. Between the box-talk and the mommys, I almost lost it.

  14. Annie says:

    Gotta say, I love this show!!! Hillarious recap, by the way.
    Erica is a mess….I hope she gets help. It’s sad to see, and her popping Adderall at 2am (or offering her boyfriend some–I couldn’t tell what the hell was going on) after a night of heavy drinking scares me. If she’s doing that, what else is she doing?

    Jeff and Gaga are funny….yes, he’s creepy, yes she’s clueless to it, but there’s SOMETHING about their relationship that makes me not mind so much. Seems like they make each other happy, so that’s cool.

    I thought people like Ashlee only existed in Woody Allen movies. Still, I find her pretty funny.

  15. Lisa says:

    So I know this was filmed a while ago, I wonder if Jeff and Amanda are still together? Married yet?

  16. Iona Trailer says:

    These chicks are a mess. Casey needs to graduate high school. Your still living with the pain of having your boyfriend stolen when you were 16? You need help as much as the slut who stole him from you. Jeff is still creepy and Rob is kinda cute.

  17. mere2142 says:

    How did their cars get to the Hamptons? Didn’t they take a party bus there? When it was time to leave, everyone got in their cars to drive home. This really bothered by OCD brain!

  18. Jenni says:

    Did anybody catch what Amanda said about Jeff staying at the hotel by himself while she went and did the afternoon thing with the ladies (when they met Clark Kent)? She said something like “Jeff wanted to be by himself if you know what I mean.” Was that code for “Jeff’s meeting up with the cabana boy”? :)

  19. Whatever says:

    I thought she just said that Jeff was taking a nap.

  20. vallegirl says:

    Thanks to your recaps I marathoned the first three episodes and I don’t know if Vince was a plant or not, but he wasn’t lying about being a tennis pro. Or more accurately a former top 20 player on the ATP tour. Albeit one who was most famous for losing 21 straight matches, but still top 20.

    And he’s always been that odd. Just surprised to recognize “Vince.” Should have realized it was him when I read the recap.

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