Is that a Book of Mormon in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me?
Howdy, Trashmii! I hear it’s a bit brisk in most of the country. It’s the same here in LA. Why, it’s going down to the 40s tonight! That’s practically sub-zero temps! Brrrr!
This episode is the gayest (closeted) thing ever!
We open with Kody telling us the family has been in transition for nearly four years, and then going on to recap pretty much everything that’s ever happened in this series. We hear again about the commitment ceremony. Meri says most polygamists don’t have commitment ceremonies. Well I think most people in general don’t have them, so whateves.
The adults are off to Emerald at Queensridge, where Kody wants to throw the “party”, and meet with general manager Ken Kimble. Now first, since the camera was already there, I am pretty sure Ken knew ahead of time who was coming. Second, he like the rest of the universe, just could not care less how many wives Kody has. Christine springs “we’re all his wives” on Ken, who responds, “We’re not the church, we’re not the government, we’re capitalists. We’re here to make money”. No kidding, the venue rents for over $10K. Of course, that’s all-inclusive!
In interview, Kody points out that polygamists don’t actually renew their vows, because their vows are eternal and marriages are a spiritual union. So it’ll be more of a party. He says he doesn’t want to go cheap on the party, unlike when one of his wives wants a party, and says his reputation is on the line. Reputation as what? Frat boy?
Speaking of boys, Kody’s
lover “best friend” Brett is coming by with his wife, Ava. We learn that Kody and Brett served a Mormon mission when they were younger. During that time, Kody’s father converted to polygamy, and afterwards Brett left the Mormon church.
Kody, Brett and Sean, Janelle’s trainer, are going to “install” wrestling mats in Janelle’s garage, so she’ll be unable to use that garage for anything else. Like putting her car in there in the boiling summer sun. Janelle tells Kody she needs the garage for storage, so Kody asks Christine if he can use her garage.
Christine then asks to speak privately to Kody, and according to Kody says she’ll agree to the mats if he’s a better husband, she gets more time with him and “more grocery money”. Really? Grocery money is a quid pro quo in this family? And why isn’t Kody spending the same amount of time with Christine as with the other wives? Admittedly, she’s a pain in the ass. But isn’t there a regular rotation? Or – is Robyn still getting most of his time?
The mats are “installed,” which seems to involve just laying them on the floor (and, inexplicably, partway up the walls). Kody tells us he’s going to use the mats “daily”. Hunter says Kody likes reliving his high school wrestling career. Honey, he’s still living in high school. Then we see some hot wrestling action between Kody and Brett. By “hot” I mean gay. Very, very gay. (Not that there’s anything wrong with that). Get a hotel room, already!
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