RHOBH Recap: Cancer Fashion

Last week on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, Yoyce acted like 12 Years a Slave was based on her experience as a Real Housewife while showing off a shoulder bone that would make Karen Carpenter jealous, …

…the editors hinted at Kyle’s true dress size, …

… and Brandi had a few glasses of whatever the hell Kim has been drinking all these years and told a fat dude to fuck off a lot.

Where’z mah houze?

We open back at Lisa’s latest advertisement party at SUR, where Brandi is getting yelled at by Yoyce’s chubby rich husband for being a drunk idiot. She says it’s not fair that he’s yelling at a woman because she doesn’t have a husband to stick up for her. His look either says that he can totally understand how she doesn’t have a husband, or he doesn’t care what happens next, he’s getting that last roll.

Yoyce shouts that she just thought Brandi was a drunk that needed rehab, but now she can see that Brandi’s just a horrible human being. You were right both times, but you’re still an asshole. As with most addicts, the word “rehab” quiets Brandi immediately.

Brandi can admit to being a lot of things, but admitting to being an alcoholic would mean that she’d have to stop drinking. She’s fucked. No defense for that one, and no one is helping her out. Lisa’s eating, and Yolanda is pretending to text Barbra Streisand.

I would say there are crickets chirping, but the frog faced hags at SUR keep snapping them up with their tongues.


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